Best comedy movie quotes of all time

Young C.C.: Iris Myandowski is a hand-walking queer.

Rooster: The sun came up again? I can't believe it! I thought when I closed my eyes last night, that that was it! But we have another day of this.

Ssiscool ★

Frank: A mental mind fuck can be nice.

Commissioner Brumford: [On phone.] Hello? He did what? How many animals escaped? Oh, my god.
Frank: Hello, Commissioner. You're looking lovely this evening.
Commissioner Brumford: Do you realize that because of you this city is being overrun by baboons?
Frank: Well, isn't that the fault of the voters?

Truly Scrumptious: Well, Mr. Potts!
Caractacus Pott: What's wrong?
Truly Scrumptious: Now you'll have to marry me!

Stig: Just because you put your finger in your belly button and brown shit comes out don't mean it's your asshole.

David Patrick: We stopped off for ice cream.
Winston: When the fuck did we get ice cream?

Hanson: Who's ready for a wing?
Dwight: Yours or the turkey's?
Hanson: Well, I know what you'd like. How about a leg?

Wyldstyle: You are not our leader.
Batman: How many movies are made about you? None. I have nine movies, and three more currently in development.

Barry B. Benson: Ya like jazz?

Ginny: I really love Rudy. He is totally enamored of me. I mean, I've had men who've loved me before, but not for six months in a row.

Tiffany: I was a slut. There will always be a part of me that is dirty and sloppy, but I like that, just like all the other parts of myself. I can forgive. Can you say the same for yourself, fucker? Can you forgive? Are you capable of that?

Puss in Boots: Feed me, if you dare.

Stan Podalak: Let me help! Let me help! I can help! I can help!
Michael Jordan: What can you do?
Stan Podalak: Well, I may not be very tall, but... I'm slow.
Sylvester: And large.
Daffy Duck: And a dork.

Principal Jane Masterson: You can plunder my dungeon anytime.
Ned Gold: I'll bring my longbow.

Frank Drebin: Faster than you could say spread 'em, I was inside the cold, gray walls of Statesville Prison. I was surrounded by pimps, rapists, and murderers. It was like being in the stands of a Los Angels Raiders game.

Bishop73

Pete: It's four in the fucking morning!
Shaun: It's Saturday!
Pete: No, it's not. It's fucking Sunday. And I've got to go to fucking work in four fucking hours 'cos every other fucker in my fucking department is fucking ill! Now can you see why I'm SO FUCKING ANGRY?!
Ed: Fuck, yeah!

Aubrey: What's your name?
Fat Amy: Fat Amy.
Aubrey: You call yourself Fat Amy?
Fat Amy: Yeah, so twig bitches like you don't do it behind my back.

Col. John 'Hannibal' Smith: Overkill is underrated.

Jonah Hill: Dear God, it's me, Jonah Hill... From Moneyball.