Chinese Food Lady: And then?
Jesse: No "and then"!
Chinese Food Lady: And then?
Hitchhiker: Thanks for the ride, lady.
Bert: Speaking of names, I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith.
Uncle Albert: What's the name of his other leg?
Adrian Cronauer: You are in more dire need of a blowjob than any white man in history.
Buck: What time do you want me to pick you up after school?
Tia: Don't bother! I'll get a ride with friends.
Buck: No, I have my orders. What time?
Tia: Are you really this stupid? I said I would get a ride. I always get a ride.
Buck: Hey, I'll just call the school, find out what time, and meet you right here.
Tia: Go ahead, call the school. I won't be here.
Buck: Stand me up today, and tomorrow I'll drive you to school in my robe and pajamas and WALK you to your first class. 4:00 okay?
Jack Sparrow: Oi fish face! I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt! Guess what's inside of it?.
Professor Fate: Leslie escaped?
General: With a small friar.
Professor Fate: Leslie escaped with a chicken?
Smokey: I got mind control over Debo. When say shut up, I be quiet, but when he leave, I be talkin' again.
Ivana Humpalot: My name is Ivana. Ivana Humpalot.
Austin Powers: Excuse me?
Ivana Humpalot: Ivana Humpalot.
Austin: And I want a toilet made out of solid gold, but it's just not in the cards now, is it?
Passepartout: I'm your new valet.
Phileas Fogg: Uh... I must commend the valet service on their impeccable foresight. But they know I only accept French valets.
Passepartout: Yes. Oh! Oui! Oui! I come from a long line of French valets. On my father's side. Very, very French.
Phileas Fogg: But your accent.
Passepartout: My father French. Never speak. My mother Chinese and never shuts up. All the children pick up her accent.
Christine 'Lady Bird' McPherson: People go by the names their parents give them, but they don't believe in God.
Troy Bolton: East High is a place where teachers encouraged us to break the status quo and define ourselves as we choose. Where a jock can cook up a mean crème brulee, and a brainiac can break it down on the dance floor. It's a place where one person, if it's the right person, changes us all. East High is having friends we'll keep for the rest of our lives, and that means we really are 'all in this together'. Once a Wildcat, always a Wildcat!
Frau Farbissina: Remember when we froze your semen? You said that if it looked like you weren't coming back we should try to make you a son so that a part of you could live forever?
Dr. Evil: Oh, sure.
Frau Farbissina: Well, after a couple of years, we got a little impatient. Dr. Evil, I want you to meet your son.
Dr. Evil: My son?
Frau Farbissina: Ja. SCOTT!
Cousin Vicki: I'm going steady, and I French kiss.
Audrey Griswold: So? Everybody does that.
Cousin Vicki: Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best at it.
[Having pulled over a speeding driver.]
Mac: All right, how about Cat Game?
Foster: Cat Game? What's the record?
Mac: Thorny did six, but I think you can do ten.
Foster: Ten? Starting right meow?
[They go up to the car.]
Driver: Sorry about the...
Foster: All right meow. Hand over your license and registration.
[The man gives him his license.]
Foster: Your registration? Hurry up meow.
Driver: [laughing.] Sorry.
Foster: Is there something funny here boy?
Driver: Oh, no.
Foster: Then why you laughing, Mister... Larry Johnson?
[Foster stares at him.]
Foster: All right meow, where were we?
Driver: Excuse me, are you saying meow?
Foster: Am I saying meow?
Driver: I thought...
Foster: Don't think boy. Meow, do you know how fast you were going?
[The man laughs.]
Foster: Meow. What is so damn funny?
Driver: I could have sworn you said meow.
Foster: Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly-bimbly from tree to tree? Am I drinking milk from a saucer? DO YOU SEE ME EATING MICE?
[The man is uncontrollably laughing.]
Foster: You stop laughing right meow!
Driver: [Stops and swallows hard.] Yes sir.
Foster: Meow, I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts meow. It's the law.
[Rips off the ticket and hands it to the man.]
Foster: Not so funny meow, is it?
[Foster gets up to leave, but Mac shakes his hands at him, indicating only nine meows.]
Foster: Meow!
Freddie Shapp: You're on the 2 AM to 5 AM slot.
Ron Burgundy: What? That's the graveyard shift!
Brick Tamland: I ain't afraid of no ghost!
Resputia Latimore: Hey Norbit, what you looking at?
Norbit Wright: Just some kids coming down the slide.
Resputia Latimore: Oh I see what you looking at, you want to see a bitch come down the slide, Imma show you how a bitch come down the slide.
Dusty Rust-eze: Thanks to you, Lightning, we had a banner year!
Rusty Rust-eze: I mean, we might even clear enough to buy you some headlights!
Dusty Rust-eze: Are you saying he doesn't have headlights?
Rusty Rust-eze: That's what I'm tellin' ya - it's just stickers!
Lightning McQueen: Well, you know, race cars don't need headlights, because the track is always lit.
Dusty Rust-eze: Well, so is my brother, but he still needs headlights!
Deb: What are you drawing?
Napoleon Dynamite: A liger.
Deb: What's a liger?
Napoleon Dynamite: It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... Bred for its skills in magic.
