Alex: David, please be rational. Let's go and see Dr. Hirsch.
David: Yeah, be rational. Sure. I'm a fucking werewolf, for Christ's sake.
Margaret Tate: If you touch my ass one more time I will cut your balls off in your sleep, okay?
Jerry: You bit off more then you can chew.
Ed: It's too late, man. I told people what you are. You've been made.
Jerry: And you think anyone's actually going to believe you?
Ed: No, No. Don't play that crap. Don't play that mind shit with me. I'm serious. Try me.
Jerry: Okay. You said you're glad you're different.
Ed: Get back!
Jerry: How can you be in a place like this? These people. Even your best friend did nothing to help.
Ed: No.
Jerry: You were born for this and you know it. It's a gift.
[Jerry bites Ed.]
Amanda: You know, I was just thinking why would I ever leave before New Year's Eve? That makes no sense at all. I mean, you didn't exactly ask me out... but you did say you loved me... so I'm thinking I've got a date. If you'll have me.
Graham: I have the girls New Year's Eve.
Amanda: Sounds perfect.
Detective James Carter: Freeze, or I'll blow your ass cheeks off.
Carla: Since when did every woman in America need completely hairless vaginas on Christmas?
Captain Ron: Hey! Uh, leg feels a lot better now, boss. I always been a fast healer, you know. 'Course I believe in Jesus, so that helps.
Mullins: That cat took one look at your shitty shitty life, and said nooooo fucking thanks.
Ninny Threadgoode: Hey Evelyn, somebody stole my house.
Vic Frohmeyer: Nora Krank, we're here for Frosty.
Coach Finstock: There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.
Crawl: Let's just get the rules straight here. There'll be absolutely no partying in this hall between the hours of 5 and 6 in the morning, without my express written permission. OK cool. Carry on.
Jack Bruno: Don't go in the pimped out fridge Jack.
Gurgle: Oh, the human mouth is a disgusting place.
Wyatt: By the way, why are we wearing bras on our heads?
Gary: It's ceremonial.
[Later, after Wyatt talks to Chet, Wyatt begins to leave the kitchen and Chet sees him wearing women's underwear.]
Chet: Like your panties.
Wyatt: [walking back into kitchen] It's a joke, Chet. Really.
Chet: No. That is not a joke. That is a severe behavioral disorder. Next thing you know you'll be wearing a bra on your head.
Debbie: Isn't he a lady killer?
Gomez Addams: Acquitted.
Melody: I didn't get your name.
Lightfoot: Well, I didn't give it to ya'. My name is Lightfoot.
Melody: "Lightfoot"?
Lightfoot: That's right.
Melody: That's a dumb name. I mean, what kind of person would name a kid that, ya' know?
Lightfoot: What's your name?
Melody: Melody.
Lightfoot: "Melody"? That's not a dumb name?.. Hey, maybe we had the same father?
Frank Moses: Kordeski trained you?
William Cooper: Yeah?
Frank Moses: I trained Kordeski.
Chad Danforth: You got game?
Ryan Evans: A little.