Natalie Geary: Let me welcome you to our humble commode.
Jake Tyler Brigance: There ain't nothin' more dangerous in this world than a fool with a cause.
Frank Serpico: You know what they say, don't you? If you love a man's garden, you gotta love the man.
Otis B. Driftwood: That's what they all say "Fuck you", well it ain't gonna save you. It don't scare me none and it don't suddenly make you a fucking hero.
Reggie Kray: A paranoid schizophrenic walks into a bar.
Jack the Ripper: I shall tell you where we are. We're in the darkest region of the human brain, a radiant abyss where men go to find themselves.
Netley: I don't understand, sir.
Jack the Ripper: Hell, Netley. We are in hell.
Eliza Birch: Did you feel bad for that deer when you shot it?
Ralph Dover: Do you feel bad for cows when you go into McDonalds?
Sergeant Howie: What religion can they possibly be learning jumping over bonfires?
Lord Summerisle: Parthenogenesis.
Sergeant Howie: What?
Lord Summerisle: Literally, as Miss Rose would doubtless say in her assiduous way, reproduction without sexual union.
Sergeant Howie: Oh, what is all this? I mean, you've got fake biology, fake religion... Sir, have these children never heard of Jesus?
Lord Summerisle: Himself the son of a virgin, impregnated, I believe, by a ghost.
Inspector Todd: Don't think, Axel! It makes my dick itch!
Ida: Personally, Veda's convinced me that alligators have the right idea. They eat their young.
Hobbs: I will beat you like a Cherokee drum.
Virgil Cane: Ain't life a motherfucker.
Eddie: Oh, and if Tom or anyone else for that matter feels like givin' them a bit of a kickin', I'm sure it won't do any harm.
Soap: Yeah, little bit of pain never hurt anybody. If you know what I mean. Also, I think knives are a good idea. Big, fuck-off shiny ones. Ones that look like they could skin a crocodile. Knives are good, because they don't make any noise, and the less noise they make, the more likely we are to use them. Shit 'em right up. Makes it look like we're serious. Guns for show, knives for a pro.
Tom: Soap, is there something we should know about you?
Bacon: I'm not sure what's more worrying. The job or your past.
Matt Farrell: You just killed a helicopter with a car!
John McClane: I was out of bullets.
Phil Philips: I never knocked a guy out with his own balls before. (00:26:05)
Dean: Do you have any idea how much therapy you people need?
Mouna Khalil: This feels like Syria.
Frank: Did it ever occur to you, to try to work for a living? Take down your own scores?
Unnamed Detective: OK, fuck this guy.
Urrizi: I'll tell you something, I'm gonna be on your ass so much, you're gonna get careless. And on that day I'm gonna be in that place.
Frank: And that, is the last place that you wanna be. 'Cause no matter what happens, I will never, ever take a pinch from a greasy motherfucker like you.