Red Webster: Don't ever marry an ugly woman. Just sucks the life right out of you.
Richie Vento: Yeah, get me Hollycourt 55377. Hello, it's Daddy. Hey, darling. Put Mommy on the phone. Yeah, Barbara, it's Richie. Yeah lookit, I ain't never coming home no more. Take it easy.
Lady Tanaka: Who sent you?
The Punisher: Batman.
[Woman checks the back pockets of Wally's pants for the coin.]
Wally: I don't know what you're looking for, but it's a little to the right.
Virgil Cane: Ain't life a motherfucker.
Hamilton "Ham" Johnson: So tragic when this happens to somebody so young and healthy. Was she feeling all right last night?
Fletch: She felt great to me.
Rudd: Now we DO have a serious diplomatic situation here, which I will be taking up with your state department first thing in the morning.
Riggs: Whoa, you got me quakin' in my boots, but I'm still gonna bring you down.
Rudd: My dear officer, you could not even give me a parking ticket!
Nick Conklin: Now, you got a counterfeiting ring goin' on and you should talk to your partner before you go to the suits. So fuck you very much.
Lawrence Isabella: I've heard a lot about you.
Joey Rosselini: Yeah? Good things, I hope.
Gabriel Cash: I don't know about you, but I have an aversion to getting F.U.B.A.R.
Ray Tango: What's F.U.B.A.R.?
Gabriel Cash: Fucked-Up Beyond All Recognition.
Captain Meissner: Convict... two things. One - I am Meissner. Two - Never fuck with Meissner. Inside.
Jerry Beck: I'm telling you something's going on here. I'm telling you something big is happening here, and all that grabs you is my language? What the fuck is the matter with you?
Dooley: Alright, let's get one thing straight: The woman is mine! Now we're both members of the animal kingdom. You know that and I know that. And we both know that this thing is really primal. So if you think you're such a badass you just try that one more time and you're gonna end up in a pet cemetary! You remember the movie Old Yeller? You remember when they shot him in the end? I didn't cry! Now come on.
Joe (Cantonese) /Jeffrey (English): Are you always so determined?
Lee: Yes, it's my style.
Joe (Cantonese) /Jeffrey (English): Mine too.
Rick: Jesus, Bob, you never told us anything about not mentioning dogs.
Bob: The reason nobody mentioned dogs, Rick, is that to mention the dog would have been a hex in itself.
Rick: All right, well, now we are on the subject, are there an other stupid things we aren't supposed to mention that will affect our future?
Clifford Stern: What is the guy so upset about? You'd think nobody was ever compared to Mussolini before.
Cpl. Brown: I'm an armour-plated motherfucker.
Eugene Hunt: Death is the best kick of all. That's why they save it for last.
Bill Roberts: There's gonna be one more killing here tonight.