Wadsworth: You see. It's just like the Mounties. We always get our man.
Mr. Green: Mrs. Peacock was a man?!
Lt. Mauser: At this point in time, yours truly was the object of a malicious prank. Now, can anybody in here tell me how this happened? [holds up his hands to show his palms covered in hair.].
Officer Mahoney: I can, sir. And if you don't stop that, you could go blind.
Marty McFly: Calvin? Why do you keep calling me Calvin?
Lorraine Baines: Well, that is your name, isn't it? Calvin Klein? It's written all over your underwear.
Lane Myer: Gee, I'm real sorry your mom blew up, Ricky.
Coach Finstock: There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.
Wyatt: By the way, why are we wearing bras on our heads?
Gary: It's ceremonial.
[Later, after Wyatt talks to Chet, Wyatt begins to leave the kitchen and Chet sees him wearing women's underwear.]
Chet: Like your panties.
Wyatt: [walking back into kitchen] It's a joke, Chet. Really.
Chet: No. That is not a joke. That is a severe behavioral disorder. Next thing you know you'll be wearing a bra on your head.
Brian Johnson: Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us - in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain...
Andrew Clark:...and an athlete...
Allison Reynolds:...and a basket case...
Claire Standish:...a princess...
John Bender:...and a criminal...
Brian Johnson: Does that answer your question? Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club.
Jerry Dandrige: Welcome to Fright Night...for real.
John Reynolds: I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm gonna kill you, I'm gonna skin you, and I'm going to use your shin bone for a pencil box.
Leroy Green: I do not even have a paint brush.
Harold Smith: Guard, protect and cherish your land, for there is no afterlife for a place that started out as Heaven. Charles M. Russell, Montana, 1926.
Charley Partanna: Do I ice her? Do I marry her?
Burt Wilson: You did what? You opened it? You stupid moron! You idiot! What's the matter with you Frank? Haven't I already told you never to even go near those goddamn tanks?
Frank: What are we gonna do, Burt?
Burt Wilson: I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to be sued by the Darrow Chemical Company. I might even be investigated by the government. I might become very famous. I might even lose my business. I might even go to jail, goddamn it! That's what I'm going to do.
Jack: Get the hell out of here now.
Fat Man: You get out of here fella. I'm trying to watch the Smurfs.
Jack: You're trying to watch the Smurfs?
Fat Man: Yeah.
Jack: Did you see the one where Papa Smurf took a crutch and smashed the shit out of a guy with a red hat? Did you see that one? You want to see that one? (Fat Man runs away).
Vince Latello: Son of a bitch, whaddaya call this wawa?
Sherman: I believe you'd call him a Neanderthal man.
Vince Latello: Well I don't care what country he's from! One shot to the chones an' he's down.
Herbert West: I know your work, Dr. Hill. Quite well. Your theory on the location of the will in the brain is... interesting. Though derivative of Dr. Gruber's research in the early 70s. So derivative in fact in Europe it's considered plagiarized.
Chris Knight: Do you mind if I name my first child after you? "Dipshit Knight" has a nice ring to it.