Best movie quotes of 1999

Jane Aubrey: You ever gotten your heart broken?
Billy Chapel: Yeah. When we lost the pennant in '87.

Capt. James West: Never drum on a white lady's boobies at a big redneck dance. Got it.

Sue Ryan: It's easy to be a bitch now that Brad Seldon's available.
Nicole: It's easy to be a bitch either way.

Sly: They've got Whit.
Dan: Who's got Whit? Wait, you're Whit.

Cole Sear: I see dead people.

P.A. Announcer: The blouse man is on the premises.

Courtney: What a fucking tearjerker. Look, Marce, it's like "Terms of Endearment Part III" only this time, the boyfriend's gay.
Marcie: Yeah, and the rest of the cast sucks.

Hawk: Only a car full of Stellas and Guidos would ride your ass on a 2-lane highway and honk.

Tillover: That's my order. My wish, is to slow dance with you, for one minute, Compton style.

Bill Gates: Think they're hookers?
Paul Allen: Either that or motel inspectors. I saw one of them go into the room next to ours about a dozen times yesterday.

Gilbert: Every theatrical performance is a contrivance by its very nature.
Sullivan: Yes, but this piece consists entirely of an artificial and implausible situation.
Gilbert: If you wish to write a Grand Opera about a prostitute, dying of consumption in a garret, I suggest you contact Mr Ibsen in Oslo. I am sure he will be able to furnish you with something suitably dull.

Richard Twat: As we always say at the Guest House Paradiso: Have fun, don't go in the water if you know what's good for you and try not to get shit on the sheets.

Adam: Manners are a way of showing other people we care about them.

Patrick 'Madman' Kelly: Honey, will you put the kids to bed?
Madman's wife: Why can't we hire a maid?
Patrick 'Madman' Kelly: Why did I ever get married?

T.J. Hicks: You know, Antoine's got a really bad temper. One time, I dropped a cigar ash on his carpet, and he made me pick it up with my anus.

Ed Singer: They are coming to Earth, aren't they?
Gonzo: I don't know.
Ed Singer: How many of them are there?
Gonzo: I don't know.
Ed Singer: When will they be here? And don't you dare tell me that you don't know.
Gonzo: I know not?

Stan: Love is just lust in disguise, and lust fades, so you damn well better be with someone who can stand you.

Rusty Zimmerman: You're ashamed of us, but we're not ashamed of you. As long as you go down on your Banana Republican knees and suck dick, you're my sisters, and I love you. And fuck off.

Jane Porter: I was saved! I was saved by a flying wild man in a loincloth.

Lester: Janey, today I quit my job. And then I told my boss to go fuck himself and blackmailed him for almost $60,000. Please pass the asparagus.