Cordelia: You want I should distract him? Make with the nice-nice while you slip by?
Angel: Don't be stupid. I'm that guy and the most beautiful woman I've ever seen is making eyes at me? It's either a bachelor party or a scam.
Cordelia: What did you just call me?
Angel: I'm sorry. You're not stupid.
Cordelia: No, after that.
Damon Salvatore: I DO believe in killing the messenger. Why? Because it sends a message.
Elaine "The Pain" Boyack: I'm very good with children, it's just, just that Tracy Beaker's not very good at being a child.
Jay Pritchett: God knows I couldn't love them more, but even the Kennedy's didn't get together this often.
Dr. Huang: I'm conflicted about labeling a ten year old a psychopath. But...
Don Cragen: "But"?
Dr. Huang: I've had a chill like that two times in my life. With death row serial killers.
Robert Romano: The operation was a screaming success if your desired outcome was paralysis.
DSU Martin Schenk: I know men like you the way you know men like me, and I know you wouldn't have done this if you believed there was the least chance of it coming back on you. Well, guess what: it's come back on you like the Hand of God, and the next words from your mouth will determine the weight and velocity of the staggering tonnage of shit that's about to plummet onto your head.
Yokas: Forgot how many personal things I tell you. Guess I forgot how much I talk to you. You know? Because you weren't there for me to talk to. I miss you, Bosco.
Napoleon Solo: My name is Napoleon Solo. I'm an enforcement agent in Section Two here. That's operations and enforcement.
Illya Kuryakin: I am Illya Kuryakin. I am also an enforcement agent. Like my friend Napoleon, I go and I do whatever I am told to by our chief.
Alexander Waverly: Hmm? Oh, yes. Alexander Waverly. Number One in Section One. In charge of this, our New York headquarters. It's from here that I send these young men on their various missions.
Reverend Jim: a Space Odyssey - S2-E3
Jim: Can you guess how many drugs I did?
Elaine: A lot.
Jim: Wow! Right on the nose!
Kitty Forman: Oh good God, you kids switch partners more than square dancers!
Stanley Roper: I want my rent.
Helen Roper: Stanley, where are your manners? You're supposed to say hello when you walk into a room.
Stanley Roper: Hello, I want my rent.
Sam: Leaping about in time, I've found that there are some things in life that I can't change, and there are some things that I can. To save a life, to change a heart, to make the right choice. I guess that's what life's about, making the right choice at the right time.
Egon Spengler: Notice the vacant stare, the completely mindless look. That could only mean one thing.
Winston Zeddemore (I): She's from California?
Egon Spengler: No. She's been hypnotized.
TV Kiddie Show Host: Sure, I remember that kid, he had on the most realistic looking pig costume I've ever seen. He won first prize.
Oliver Douglas: No, you don't understand, Arnold is a real PIG.
TV Kiddie Show Host: I'll say he is! We had five gallons of ice cream for those kids, and he ate every bit of it himself.
Hamilton Burger: Incompetent, irrelevant, and immaterial.
Lt. Arthur Fancy: The future keeps telling us what the past was about. You make the past mean different things by the way you use the time that comes after.
Interviewer: Well, can you... destroy the Earth?
Tick: Egad. I hope not. That's where I keep all my stuff.
Officer Gunther Toody: Ooh! Ooh.