Eddie Sweat: Hey, Kentucky! Big old Red done ate his breakfast this morning! And you about to see something that you ain't never even seen before.
Peter La Fleur: Are you sure that this is completely necessary?
Patches O'Houlihan: Necessary? Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine?
Peter La Fleur: Probably not.
Patches O'Houlihan: No, but I do it anyway because it's sterile and I like the taste.
Leigh Anne Touhy: If you so much as set foot downtown you will be sorry. I'm in a prayer group with the D.A., I'm a member of the NRA and I'm always packing.
Pat Summerall: That's the second time tonight a Washington player's been knocked out by his own teammate.
John Madden: You know, there's a rule in sports, "Don't do anything great if you can't handle the congratulations."
Pat Summerall: There is?
John Madden: Yep.
Mrs. Bhamra: What family would want a daughter-in-law who can run around kicking football all day but can't make round chapatis?
Treyvonetta: Mama said I can't be in no gang.
Randy 'The Ram' Robinson: The eighties fucking ruled, man, until that pussy Cobain came and fucked it all up.
Father Gaston: The school, what was happening there. It was wrong.
Ali: How is it that the ultimate prize in the most macho sport ever invented is a piece of jewelry?
Josef Grul: Hey, Jamaica! Watch out for Number Twelve turn. Scary, ja?
Derice Bannock: What's his problem?
Irv: He's Josef Grul. He's one of the best drivers in the world.
Yul Brenner: Yeah, he's one of the biggest assholes in the world, too.
Thornton Melon: Listen, Sherlock. While you were tucked away up here working on your ethics, I was out there busting my hump in the real world. And the reason guys like you got a place to teach is 'cause guys like me donate buildings.
Lincoln Hawk: I always wanted to be a milk shake.
Carroll Shelby: There's a point, 7000 rpm, where everything fades. The machine becomes weightless. Just disappears. And all that's left is a body, moving through space and time. 7000 rpm, that's where you meet it. Asks you a question. The only question that matters. Who are you?
Romeo Posar: Now THAT was a defining moment. And the definition was "shit."
Gordon Bombay: Keep swingin'. Maybe you'll give them a cold.
Oscar Madison: I can't take it anymore, Felix, I'm cracking up. Everything you do irritates me. And when you're not here, the things I know you're gonna do when you come in irritate me. You leave me little notes on my pillow. Told you 158 times I can't stand little notes on my pillow. "We're all out of cornflakes. F.U." Took me three hours to figure out F.U. was Felix Ungar.
Crash Davis: This son of a bitch is throwing a two-hit shutout. He's shaking me off. You believe that shit? Charlie, here comes the deuce. And when you speak of me, speak well.
Lindsey Meeks: You don't see us tangled up in the sheets with the Eiffel Tower in the background. You see the Mariners are coming in, and Pedro's pitching Friday.
Ben: No, on Saturday. Schilling's Friday.
Coach Norman Dale: If you put your effort and concentration into playing to your potential, to be the best that you can be, I don't care what the scoreboard says at the end of the game, in my book we're gonna be winners.