Best comedy movie quotes of 2005

[Quartermaine's hairpiece has been sucked up in the bunvac.]
Lord Victor Quartermaine: I want...toupee, please.
Wallace: Oh, grand. We take cheques or cash.
Lord Victor Quartermaine: Toupee, you idiot. My hair is in your machine.
Wallace: Oh, no, it's only rabbits in there. The hare I think you'll find is a much larger mammal.

Al Giordino: Hi! How are ya?

Slartibartfast: You must come with me, quickly or, or you'll be late!
Arthur: Late for what?
Slartibartfast: What? Oh, no...What is your name, earthman?
Arthur: Dent. Arthur Dent.
Slartibartfast: Late, as in the late Dentarthurdent. It's a kind of threat, you see.

Bo Duke: Luke, you manwhore!

Great Aunt Adelaide: Incest.

Buck Cluck: You gotta be ready to listen to your children, even if they have nothing to say.

David Bloomberg: I'm 23.
Rafi Gardet: No, you're not. I don't believe you. Let me see the license... Oh, my God! You're a child. Taxi! I have T-shirts older than you.

Stitch: Stitch not bad. Stitch fluffy.

Bailey: I want you to do something for me.
Tibby: What?
Bailey: Finish your movie.
Tibby: Why?
Bailey: Because you can.

Stewie Griffin: Look, I really don't want to go to hell, but I can't stop my nature. I'm just a hateful person.
Brian Griffin: You're not hateful you just need to control your anger. Like I do.
Stewie Griffin: Oh, you mean by being sauced all day! Wait a minute! Of Course! That's it! If I'm drunk I'll be calm and if I'm calm I'll be nice, and if I'm nice then I won't go to hell. Fix me a highball I'm going to get good and tight.

Maggie Peyton: What's really your problem with me racing?
Ray Peyton Sr.: 'Cause you're the spittin' image of your mom... and... I can't lose her twice.

Sarah: If you're gonna marry someone you might as well marry your best friend.

Dave Spritz: People don't throw things at me any more. Maybe because I carry a bow around.

Walt: Oh my god, he is deranged!

Harry: Still gay?
Gay Perry: Me? No, I'm knee-deep in pussy. I just like the name so much I can't get rid of it.

Morris Buttermaker: Is that a baggy full of bacon?
Mike Engelberg: I'm on Atkins.

Bugsy: I've been shanghaiiiied.

Bree Osbourne: My body may be a work-in-progress, but there is nothing wrong with my soul.

André: Who'd be dead if I hadn't saved you?
Angel-A: Who'd be dead if there wasn't anyone to save?

Shane Wolfe: Rule number one: never be too eager to rush your opponent.