Casey Schuler: How many brain cells did I kill?
Sam Daniels: How many? About a billion.
Casey Schuler: Oh, now I'm only as smart as you.
Sam Daniels: What can we give him to kill his sense of humor?
Mel: Do you know what time it is?
Cher: A watch doesn't really go with this outfit, daddy.
Telly: When you're young, not much matters. When you find something that you care about, then that's all you got. When you go to sleep at night you dream of pussy. When you wake up it's the same thing. It's there in your face. You can't escape it. Sometimes when you're young the only place to go is inside. That's just it - fucking is what I love. Take that away from me and I really got nothing.
Angela: For future reference you should know that the living tend to interest me just a little more than the dead do.
Grace: Emma Rae, I have a cookbook to put out, and a daughter to raise, and the God damn winter Grand Prix. And I just don't have time for the nervous breakdown I deserve, so please, don't ask me to stop and think.
Pecos Bill: I ought to plug you two right now, but I make it a rule never to kill a man on Sunday.
Zeb: Today's Wednesday.
Reverend George: They have the look of man... but not the nature of mankind.
He Zhiwu: They say that love can change a man. I start to find myself looking better and more charming, and suddenly I discover that I'm turning blonde.
Cage: While you're at it, why don't you call my agent?
Blade: Do I look like your secretary?
Capt. T.C. Doyle: Does anybody else here know how to work an elephant?
Harvey (H.A.) Ashford: I was in love with a fat woman once, but she never listened to me.
Arthur Rimbaud: The only unbearable thing is that nothing is unbearable.
Baby Sinister: The fact of the matter is by the year 2000 every city will be black. Thanks to the fax, the modem, conference call, federal-fking express, the beast will be able to conduct his business from his home in the white suburb leaving the city a great wide warzone full of nuclear brothers.
Rooster: That's what I'm saying man, the fax, modem, FTD.
Baby Sinister: What the fk you talking about, FTD?
Rooster: You got to have flowers in the warzone, Baby.
Hal Griffith: How'd they get you to stay?
Louanne: They gave me candy and called me their light.
Hal Griffith: That'll do it.
Marko: We're all crazy, Natalija. We just haven't been diagnosed yet.
Elaine: I do the best I can, honey. I know it's not enough, and I'm sorry. But that's what you get in life, you know? You get whoever you end up with. Whoever is willing to stick by you, and fight for you, when everyone else is gone. And it ain't always who you expect. But you just have to make do.
Casey Ryback: You think this is being shot? This ain't being shot.
Kabral: The black guy always dies. Think about it, man. Unforgiven. Alien. Rocky IV. The Shining.
Roy: Star Trek II. Forrest Gump. Witness.
Bud: Annie Hall. Not Annie Hall.
Roy: No, Night of the Living Dead.
Bud: That's the one!
Kabral: And what about that brother in Jurassic Park, man?
Bud: There were two black guys who died in that one. That was a twofer. You must be really pissed off at that one.
Chili Palmer: Harry, look at me. You're trying to tell me you fucked up without sounding stupid, and that's hard to do.