Hadley Wolfmeyer: What kind of a dickhead runs away with his secretary? That is lame, take a right, make a left at pathetic.
Mayor Buckman: Got any last requests, boy?
Malcolm: Yeah. Kiss my black ass.
Isabel Bigelow: Guess what? I'm a witch.
Jack Wyatt: Guess what? I'm a Clippers fan.
Nola Rice: Men think I may be something special.
Chris Wilton: Are you?
Nola Rice: No one's ever asked for their money back.
Elliot Wilhelm: When are you going to call me?
Chili Palmer: When your phone rings.
Floyd: Welcome to Thunderdome, bitch!
Winnie the Pooh: The heffalump ate my honey. Well actually, I did, but it made me do it.
Chanel: I know Botox Barbie didn't just call me ignorant.
Tobin Keller: You lose somebody, you lose somebody. I don't wanna lose two somebodies.
Valiant: It's not the size of your wingspan that counts, no, it's the size of your spirit.
Bree Osbourne: My body may be a work-in-progress, but there is nothing wrong with my soul.
Audrey Billings: You said if I needed anything.
Frank Martin: I can't.
Audrey Billings: Why, because of who I am?
Frank Martin: Because of who I am.
Skip: Yeah, this is Skip Engblom and the Zephyr Skateboard Team. Here's our entry fees. Now where's our trophies?
Jimmy Cuervo: Someone owes me two lifetimes and a set of perfect blue eyes.
Melquiades Estrada: Promise me one thing, Pete. If I die over here, carry me back to my family and bury me in my home town. I don't want to be buried on this side among all the fucking billboards.
Pickle Factory boss: Writer huh? Are you sure?
Henry Chinaski: No, I'm not. I'm halfway through a novel.
Pickle Factory boss: What's it about?
Henry Chinaski: Everything.
Pickle Factory boss: It's about... cancer?
Henry Chinaski: Yes.
Pickle Factory boss: How about my wife?
Henry Chinaski: She's in there too.
