Emma: You can't find something if you don't know what you're looking for.
Rincewind: That's old Twoflower for you. He just appreciates beauty in his own way. I mean, if a poet sees a daffodil, he stares at it and then writes a long poem. But Twoflower would wander off and buy a book on botany, and then as he reads it he would tread on the daffodil.
Flynn Carsen: The Judas Chalice. The holy grail for vampires.
Victor Mancini: My God... you're crazy.
Paige Marshall: No, I'm just... working a few things out.
Mike Manadoro: I work in the typical car service crew. Evenly split between the retired, and the retarded.
Maurice: It's oaky... Oh, yeah, and smoky. I detect... bacon fat... laced with honey melon.
Brandon King: Who wants to play lets start shootin' people?
Kym: I am Shiva the destroyer, your harbinger of doom this evening.
Charles Ryder: I'm sorry.
Sebastian Flyte: Whatever for?
Charles Ryder: Everything.
Joe: Where there's money, there's competition and the guy paying me usually wins.
Colonel J.S. Wilson: Why do you want to be a saboteur, Max?
Max Manus: My country was stolen from me, Sir... and I want it back.
Bender: Don't hurt me! I'll betray anyone.
Frank Allen: You caught me reminiscing. A lot of memories here. Buy you a drink?
Ed: Oh, I'd love to Frank, but uh... I'm kind of... I'm... I'm in a bit of a rush.
Frank Allen: I insist. After all, it is the traditional function of the father of the bride.
Ed: What is?
Frank Allen: Keeping the groom away from back exits.
Joseph Young: So, are you good friends with that Alexis girl?
Molly Hartley: No. Why?
Joseph Young: I don't know. Just wondering.
Molly Hartley: She's nice to me. That's all.
Joseph Young: Nice? I can be nice.
Edgar Frog: Your sister's a suck monkey.
Larry: I'm gonna shove that BlackBerry up where it's gonna be a BrownBerry.
Sonja Jones: I'm one huge catalog of faults.
Richard Samuels: Oh, name me one fault.
Sonja Jones: My left breast is smaller than my right.
Richard Samuels: You got a ruler?
Richie Nix: I read about this guy once who weighed 1200 pounds. Can you believe that? For breakfast he'd have like 2 pounds of bacon, a dozen eggs, some rolls. Then for lunch he'd have 4 hamburgers, 4 double cheeseburgers, 8 boxes of fries. For dinner: 3 ham steaks, 6 sweet potatoes, 6 or 7 regular potatoes, some stuffing.
The Spirit: My city, I can not deny her. My city screams. She is my mother. She is my lover, and I am her Spirit.