Mr. Coplin: San Diego has a big carjacking problem. They bump you, and when you stop, they mutilate you and take your car.
Buster Stupid: What if we formed our own army?
Petunia Stupid: Then we'd have to form our own country.
Joan Stupid: We could call it Stupidia.
Zeke: Step outside.
Rafe Guttman: Sorry, Zeke - I'm just not in the mood for a blowjob.
Bodacious TV Anchor: ...this may be the first time that a serial killer has used poison cereal to kill his victims.
Franklin: Boy you're touchy.
Travis: He's got hemorrhoids, Franklin.
Franklin: You got 'roids?
Ché: One always picks the easy fight. One praises fools, one smothers light. One shifts from left to right. Politics - the art of the possible.
Tommy: No, Paul is not my friend. He lives in my house. I got cockroaches, I got termites... I got Paul.
Kirby: Dad are we really going to New York City?
Roscoe Bigger: That's why they call them mobile homes, son, 'cause they're mobile.
Richard Clark: Victoria, could you give me a ride home? I seem to have misplaced my car.
Victoria Chapell: Oh, don't worry about it. All the teachers loose their car on their first day.
Al: I'm proud of you Joe.
Joe MacGonaughgill: Why?
Al: You finally figured out the girl in your heart isn't the girl in your dreams. Some people don't figure it out all their lives.
Damien Wayne Echols: I knew from when I was real small people were gonna know who I was, I always had that feeling... I just never knew how they were gonna learn. I kind of enjoy it now because even after I die, people are gonna remember me forever. People are gonna talk about me for years. People in West Memphis will tell their kids stories... It'll be sorta like I'm the West Memphis boogie man. Little kids will be looking under their beds - "Damien might be under there!"
Bobby DeLaughter: I don't see what difference it makes if a man was bushwhacked yesterday, today, or 27 damn years ago. Murder is murder. And it's still my job to bring the son of a bitch to justice. And it's still your job to help me.
Delamar Dennis: No! I did my job. I testified against the Klan. They shot out my windows, blew up my car, they hunted and harassed me for twenty five years. Don't that get me even for the wrong I done?
Bobby DeLaughter: We never get even for the wrong we've done.
Nagiko: How can I get pleasure writing on you? You have to write on me.
Jerome: Go on. Use my body like the pages of a book. Of your book.
Tina: Don't get too excited, boys. On the planet Dominia, when a woman of royal blood shows you her breasts, it's a death sentence.
Sticks: And what part of her anatomy is she gonna kill me with?
Joe: The Martians have landed. They want our women.
Perry: Mr. Koontz, I don't think you understand me. Let me clear: I'm accustomed to getting what I want. I want that bear.
John Merchant: For God's sake.
Pinhead: Do I look like someone who cares what God thinks?
Brian: You know I was just thinking about the first time you ever rode a bike. Remember that?
Jack: Oh yeah.
Brian: You were so determined to ride. You kept wiping out and nearly took out a couple of the neighbors. It took a couple days until you finally got it, and look at you now! I mean, you're riding like a pro.
Al Fountain: I can't believe it. I've been looking all over for this place. I don't know why, really. I spent a couple of days there when I was a kid, and, and I just remember having a really good time.
Old Motel Clerk: Me, too. My brother and I drowned a cat there once.
Al Fountain: Is that right?
Jacob Ryan: That's juts a bunch of sentimental bullshit.
Carolyn Ryan: Wait, sentimental bullshit.
Jacob Ryan: Yeah everyone's parents say that.
Carolyn Ryan: Oh really, and do everyone's parent destroy evidence and lie... to the police?