Victor: It's not a mushroom, okay. It's a truffle.
Becca: Why didn't He just make one, if He needed another Angel? He is God, after all.
Liz Gilbert: I'm sick of people telling me that I need a man.
Felipe: You don't need a man, Liz. You need a champion.
Mrs. Kornfeldt: Excuse me, Stewardess? Three chardonnays, please.
Mr. Kornfeldt: None for me, actually. I like to stay awake and alert.
Jen Kornfeldt: None for me, either.
Mrs. Kornfeldt: Okay, so, just the three chardonnays then.
Orlov: The name of the agent is Evelyn Salt.
Evelyn Salt: My name is Evelyn Salt.
Orlov: Then you are a Russian spy.
Black Adam: You fight for the Wizard?
Superman: I fight for those who can't fight for themselves.
Mike Pomeroy: You know what I've noticed, people only say "lighten up" when they're gonna stick their fist up your ass.
Puck: Six beers enter. No beers leave.
Fergie: Benny McGill's wee brother's a smart wee cunt. How do you no' know I'm no' on my way to go stab fuck out of him right now? And how do you know I wouldnae take it out on you? See that there? That's a fucking blade. Know what that's used for? For gutting daft wee fucking boys like you, you wee cunt. Luckily for you, however, I'm a fuckin' good guy, and me and Benny are good pals.
Sergio Roma: You've been mind-fucked before?
Aaron Green: I don't think so.
Sergio Roma: I'm mind-fucking you right now.
Aaron Green: You are?
Sergio Roma: Can't you feel my dick fucking your mind?
Aaron Green: No, I can't really feel anything.
Sergio Roma: See? That's it. That's the art of it. I'm mind-fucking the shit out of you.
Aaron Green: Well I hope you're wearing a condom cause I have a dirty mind.
Lou: Tab Lazenby. So you're the new fat cat at meows. And by that, I mean you should really switch to skimmed milk.
Tab Lazenby: Oh, Lou, so catty. I see they've given you the key to the executive dumpster. All that butt-sniffing finally paid off.
Mickey Ward: I'm the one who's fighting. Not you, not you, and not you.
Piiparinen: See for yourselves. There's something really weird about him. Don't you think?
Aimo: He's a foreigner.
Shuya Watanabe: Nobody taught me that killing people was wrong. Where other kids got read picture books and fairy tales, my mom taught me Ohm's Law and Norton's theorum. She only ever talked about electronics.
Bothos: Quintus, what's she doing?
Brick: She's a Pict and a woman - two good reasons not to trust her.
The Father: Maybe I want to get caught.
Lou Ford: I got a foot on both sides of the fence. They were put there early, and they stayed put. I can't move. I can't jump. All I can do is wait until I split, right down the middle.
Matty: Let me ask you something, how do you know when you're in love?
Bullpen Pitcher: Well.
Matty: What?
Bullpen Pitcher: I've got a way, whenever this one thing happens I know I'm done. I will tell you but its personal and I don't want anybody making fun of me for it.
Matty: No, no-ones going to... just go.
Bullpen Pitcher: I think I'm in love with somebody when I wear a condom with the other girls, OK?
Matty: Holy shit I'm in love.
Rocha: Each dog licks his own dick.