Teddy Daniels: Baby, I love this because you gave it to me, but it is one fuckin' ugly tie.
Chico: Have you thought about your career? About your future?
Rita: Future, what future? The future never gave me anything! All my hopes are set on the past.
Bob Quimby: Ramona, your sister has a report card. Doesn't that mean you should have one too?
Ramona Quimby: Uh... No.
Samantha Wynden: Doesn't that kind of bother you, that you need something bad to happen to profit from it?
Andrew Kaulder: You mean, like a doctor?
Kim Fowley: You hear that? That's the sound of hormones raging.
Moose: One move can give a skinny, curly haired kid hope... hope that he's something special.
Aron Ralston: You know, I've been thinking. Everything is... Just comes together. It's me. I chose this. I chose all this. This rock... This rock has been waiting for me my entire life. It's entire life, ever since it was a bit of meteorite a million, billion years ago. In space. It's been waiting, to come here. Right, right here. I've been moving towards it my entire life. The minute I was born, every breath that I've taken, every action has been leading me to this crack on the outer surface.
Doctor Monro: And your new students, are they enjoying your lectures?
Doctor Robert Knox: Er, not as much as I understand they're enjoying your wife, sir.
Becca: This is biology. Why are we reading The Vampire Diaries?
Edward: In the eighties, coke was all the rage. The ninties, grunge. Now it's the era of vampires. It's just super trendy.
Quentin Turnbull: You see, with weapons like these, one day we shall be able to level continents. But we'll have to content ourselves with starting small.
Jarod: I had a weird day at school today.
Stan: What happened?
Jarod: An officer came to lecture us in algebra.
Stan: What about?
Jarod: You know that kid I was telling you about the other day?
Stan: The one you had trouble with?
Jarod: Yeah, the guy who thought I was doing something with his girlfriend. He's gone missing, too.
Stan: So, that's both of them? That's strange... strange. What did you say their names were again?
Jarod: David and Lindsey.
Stan: That's right.
Jarod: They're not sure what happened to him yet, but I think he might be dead.
Stan: Why would you think that?
Jarod: Well, you can only go around being a dickhead for so long before it turns around and bites you in the ass.
Stan: So, do you think it was an accident?
Jarod: No.
Stan: Me neither.
Jarod: I think when a person like that is dealt with it should be applauded, not punished.
Stan: I couldn't agree with you more. (00:52:13)
Thomas Leroy: Thank you, Nina! It's very nice. It's very nice, but I knew the white swan wouldn't be your problem. The real work would be your metamorphosis into her evil twin. I know I saw a flash of her yesterday, so get ready to give me more of that bite.
Edwin Stanton: No. Damn it! No. No, she must be punished to the full extent. I want these people buried and forgotten.
Joseph Holt: The majority prefer a more merciful sentence, life in prison on account of her age, gender.
Edwin Stanton: I give Mr. Aiken credit. He knew just how to use the daughter.
Joseph Holt: It seems so.
Edwin Stanton: You made my sentiments known to the Commission?
Joseph Holt: Their minds are made.
Edwin Stanton: Then let us change them.
Kludd: You have a soft head, Soren. Filled with stories, and dreams.
Soren: There's nothing wrong with dreams.
Young Robin: Twenty rounds a second and you're still too slow.
Griff: Where does the Church believe this pestilence has come from?
Osmund: I don't believe God is punishing us, like many do.
Swire: I say from France, where all foul things emerge.
Charlie: Wait, wait a minute, this can't be happening to me. I'm nobody. I'm just a waitress! I don't even own a car.