Best comedy movie quotes of 2010

Louis Ives: You have a strange power over people, Henry.
Henry Harrison: It's my constant disapproval. Some find it fatherly.

John 'Spud' Milton: I don't know about you Sir, but drinking just makes me sad. It's like the more you drink, the sadder you get... and the sadder you get the more you drink.

Howard Marks: A dealer is really just someone who buys more dope than he can smoke. And I have to say, I'm ashamed, I tried to smoke it all. There was just too fuckin' much of it.

Phil Foster: [To Holbrooke.] Would you please, for the love of God, PUT ON A FUCKING SHIRT?!?

Ma-Ti: You're a fool, Critic! A damn fool! You cannot change your destiny! You can only choose to meet it... and you will fail.

Paul Hodges: Why did you smack me?
Jimmy Monroe: I was in the moment, and the moment said smack ya.

Snork: Why does Noddy have a bell on his hat? 'Cause he's a cunt.

Spencer Aimes: We've been married for three years and we've never been more than five minutes away from your parents. They're always coming over and your dad's all... all... Well, uh, this is how the Kornfeldt's load the dishwasher. And, mow the lawn clockwise 'cause that's the Kornfeldt way. Take this piece of coal, stick it up your kiester, squeeze it real tight like we do, and you'll and make a Kornfeldt diamond.

Claudia: Not every woman needs 2.5 kids and a husband and a mini-van to complete her. My friends are my family, that firm is my spouse, I wake up every morning, a happy, single, successful woman, wondering what on earth could I possibly need?
Gina: Ha-ha! So you got it all figured out huh?
Claudia: Yeah. Pretty much.
Gina: Well, I guess we will see.
Claudia: I know what I want and I'm getting it. We're done. Stop the car! Get out.

Sophie: That's so romantic.
Charlie: What's so romantic about eating in the dirt?

Dylan Dog: See? That's just what this case needed. A seven-foot tall, flesh-eating zombie. Which begs the question, are there any actual people left in New Orleans?

Pharrell Williams: You're five zippers away from "Thriller."
Sergio Roma: Oh, and you're one shirt away from Carlton, muthafucka.

Parrot: I love you, Mr Maynard.
Victor Maynard: What the fuck?

Steve-O: How many stings do you think we can take?
Manny Puig: I think it takes about 100 to kill a man.
Dave England: Are you serious? Did you just make that number up? There's 50,000 bees and it takes 100 to kill a man?
Manny Puig: I think it takes 100.
Loomis Fall: Then what are we doing here?
Manny Puig: Making a hit movie.

Sheila: You are nothing but rubber shit.

Mary: You can't go around with a big sign saying don't fall in love with me I'm married.
Tom: Well, most people wear a ring.
Mary: Well he didn't.

Dan Sanders: Miley Cyrus.

Beth: It's like, I meet a guy, and I think it's great, and anyone else would just be thinking about how much greater it's going to get. And I'm constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Nick: You know, lightning does strike once in a while, Beth. Trust me, I know.

Jack Abramoff: Washington is like Hollywood, but with uglier faces.

Nick Halsey: You need to put up some curtains.
Samantha: Why? So I don't have some drunk staring at me all day?
Nick Halsey: No so you don't have to look at your future.