Ginger: If you want a chance in hell at getting your daughter back, you better listen up. Unless of course, you want to stay here, in this loser existence, while your daughter grows up to be the fluffer in her daddy's new videos.
Stanley Jobson: Please pay me the courtesy of not confusing your own childhood with my daughter's.
The Lizard: I want McElroy kept alive.
Dakota: I don't do alive, I do dead.
The Monster: Nobody's afraid of me any more.
Beatrice: ...I'm afraid of you.
Odin: Where is my scarf?
Desi: I don't know.
Odin: You lost it?
Desi: No, I just misplaced it.
Odin: Does Michael know where my scarf is?
Desi: What? If you're asking me if I'm cheating on you, get some balls and ask! Michael? You're the only person I've ever been with and you're the only person I want to be with! And if you want to be with me you never talk to me like that again, ever.
Nash: In competitive behavior someone always loses.
Charles: Well, my niece knows that, John, and she's about this high.
Nash: See if I derive an equilibrium where prevalence is a non-singular event where nobody loses, can you imagine the effect that would have on conflict scenarios, arm negotiations...
Charles: When did you last eat?
Nash: ...currency exchange?
Charles: When did you last eat? You know, food.
Nash: You have no respect for cognitive reverie, you know that?
Charles: Yes. But pizza - now, pizza I have enormous respect for. And of course beer.
Nash: I have respect for beer. I HAVE RESPECT FOR BEER!
Cepheglia: This is a French Cho-Cho.
Rosen: Chauchat.
Cepheglia: It's a piece of garbage, don't worry about it.
Rosen: Leave it to Henchman and Hollingshead.
Cepheglia: Don't worry about mortars, tanks and artillery.
Rosen: We don't have any of that either.
Cepheglia: Basically we're mud crunchers,.
Rosen: Gravel agitators.
Cepheglia: Infantry.
Mr. Neutron: Look, I was a kid once. I remember being grounded a whole week and not being allowed to go to my best friend's bachelor party.
Dad: You can't make things like that up, son. Killing people is wrong, destroying demons is good. Don't worry, God will send you your own list when you're older.
Jean-Francois de Morangias: So tell me sir, do they speak of the beast in Paris?
Gregoire De Fronsac: Speak of it? They're already singing songs about it.
Geneviève de Morangias: Instead of singing songs, they should be saying prayers.
Mugatu: Let me show you Derelicte. It is a fashion, a way of life inspired by the very homeless, the vagrants, the crack whores that make this wonderful city so unique.
Jerry: I don't know what it takes! I'm new in the fuck you business.
Goli: Will our dream ever come true? No, Bhuvan. It hurts too much to dream like that.
Bhuvan: Have faith, Goli. He who has truth and courage in his heart shall win in the end.
Principal Prickly: I never saw Philliam again. He quit teaching, went into politics, eventually became Secretary of Education, until the president fired him for trying to get rid of recess again. Only this time it was nationwide.
Jerry Black: I made a promise, Eric. You're old enough to remember when that meant something.
Carter: Now gimme a hundred-thousand in chips, and a diet pepsi and some hot wings!
Wellness Guide: We have a saying, Edward: "Mecka lecka halava, beem sala beem."
Eddie: What is that? Bean salad?
Wellness Guide: "Mecka lecka halava, beem sala beem."
Eddie: What does that mean?
Wellness Guide: I don't know what it means, it's very old.
Cowboy: Hey, pretty girl, time to wake up.
Ernest Gordon: When you surrender in war, you're stripped of your dignity as a soldier. And all you've got left is your fellow comrades, many of whom you've just met.
Stan: There's been a PI at the shark pool.
Jordan: PI?
Stan: Puking incident. Some kid puked all over the shark pool. Anyway, I need you to clean it up for me right away. A.S.A.P.