Rubin 'Hurricane' Carter: He who bemoans the lack of opportunity, forgets that small doors many times open up into large rooms.
Nick Parks: C'mon, I made the ultimate sacrifice: 1 first class ticket for 3 economy.
Alice Marano: You'll never know what you ultimately sacrificed.
Bill Gates: Think they're hookers?
Paul Allen: Either that or motel inspectors. I saw one of them go into the room next to ours about a dozen times yesterday.
Lester: Janey, today I quit my job. And then I told my boss to go fuck himself and blackmailed him for almost $60,000. Please pass the asparagus.
Dino Velvet: If there was no honor among perverts and pornographers, the whole fucking business would fall apart.
Gilbert: Every theatrical performance is a contrivance by its very nature.
Sullivan: Yes, but this piece consists entirely of an artificial and implausible situation.
Gilbert: If you wish to write a Grand Opera about a prostitute, dying of consumption in a garret, I suggest you contact Mr Ibsen in Oslo. I am sure he will be able to furnish you with something suitably dull.
Brandon: Lana, you are one cranky girl.
Tuptim: If love were a choice, who would choose such exquisite pain?
Dr. Bill Harford: Now, where exactly are we going... exactly?
Gayle: Where the rainbow ends.
Dr. Bill Harford: Where the rainbow ends?
Nuala: Don't you want to go where the rainbow ends?
Dr. Bill Harford: Well, now that depends where that is.
Gayle: Well, let's find out.
Adam: Manners are a way of showing other people we care about them.
Jordan Armstrong: You know, maybe if I had the luxury of getting my ass whooped, I could be calm right now. But I have been drinking tequila shots, my hormones are raging out of control, I'm emotional, I'm horny, and I don't wanna hear about no goddamn peas! Fuck you! Good night.
Stan: Love is just lust in disguise, and lust fades, so you damn well better be with someone who can stand you.
Rob Geller: See ya around the Cell Block, Mrs. Robinson.
Patrick 'Madman' Kelly: Honey, will you put the kids to bed?
Madman's wife: Why can't we hire a maid?
Patrick 'Madman' Kelly: Why did I ever get married?
Cole Sear: I see dead people.
Val Resnick: The problem with kicking a Chow's ass is an hour later you wanna do it again.
Dave: Why are we doing this?
Chase: As a protest.
Dave: Of what?
Ray: People, right?
Chase: Sheep.
Ray: Check, Dave. We're doing this to protest sheep.
Dave: And what specifically about sheep do we object to?
Ray: Chase?
Chase: General herding mentality.
P.A. Announcer: The blouse man is on the premises.
