Mesh-Head: If I were you, I would run.
Buddy: If you were me, you'd be good-lookin'.
Kevin Dunne: Don't give me that wounded look. You haven't got the face for it.
Mrs. Jenkins: Oh! I'll put on lots and lots of tea.
Tony Gardella: Tom Dale. Big star. He's in New York filming an adaptation of a sequel of a remake.
Raymond Hope: Has your prostate started acting up yet?
Harry Ames: No.
Raymond Hope: Oh well, you've got that to look forward to.
Jessica: Tum Tum, I made your favorite bacon, lettuce, tomato, bologna, ham and swiss cheese sandwich.
TumTum: No thanks mom, I'm not hungry.
Collecter: Ah that's my new ballast I just picked up, gotta keep the old ship steady you know.
Marcella: Yeah but some how our egg got mixed up with your ballast. What's a ballast?
Debbie Strand: No means no. Don't you guys get that? What is it, you stop understanding English when you get a hard-on?
Kate Gulden: Thank you for the world so sweet.Thank you for the food we eat.Thank you for the birds that sing.Thank you, God, for everything.
Isadora: If you ever miss me, take a look at our little portrait. I say this because I fear that you'll forget me as well. I miss my father. I miss everything. Dora.
Brian Slade: I should think that if people were to get the wrong impression of me, the one to which you so eloquently referred, it wouldn't be the wrong impression in the slightest.
Stoner Guy: You know who else I like that didn't get much play? Velma from Scooby-Doo. She was cool. She was a hip, hip lady.
Henry Cavendish: I stink. I shall bathe in scent for you.
Mary Blackchurch: Don't do it for me. Do it for yourself.
Ricky Hayman: Good. Better. Best. Never let it rest, 'til your good is Better and your better is best.
Narrator: Do you know where you are?
Mohammed Ali Jinnah: I believe I have some idea.
Bill Bowerman: Running, one might say, is basically an absurd past-time upon which to be exhausting ourselves. But if you can find meaning, in the kind of running you have to do to stay on this team, chances are you will be able to find meaning in another absurd past-time: Life.
Ryan Harrison: Your lies are like bananas. They come in big yellow bunches.
Trillian St. James: What the hell are these things?
Finnegan: Real unfriendly.
Edwards: Mr. President, we have to give bears the right to vote... or bears will rise up and then bears will be in congress and we will be the ones performing in the circus, wearing little hats.
Gwen Cromwell Piper: You are not a witch.
Marnie Cromwell: Oh, yes, I am, no thanks to you. You were going to let my powers go away forever.