Deputy Travis Junior: Getting two tickets to an execution is like getting two tickets to NASCAR, except you know Jeff Gordon's gonna die.
John Bacchus: You're under arrest.
George Gently: He's under arrest, when I say he is.
Sonny Crockett: I get these occasional urges for stability in my life.
Greg Sanders: For the record, I really like having a penis.
The Cat Who Cried Wolf - S1-E7
Detective Gordon Katsumoto: Why are you following me?
Thomas Magnum: Uh...
Detective Gordon Katsumoto: Word of advice: if you wanna tail someone, don't do it in a red Ferrari. (00:30:00)
Christopher Moltisanti: Whatever you do, do not engage Silvio in conversation.
Captain: Why would he use his son's gun? He knew that we would trace it back to that house. It doesn't make sense.
Burl Loomis: A lot of things don't make sense. Why are nickels bigger than dimes?
Captain: That's a good point.
Loomis: Why does Hawaii have an interstate highway?
Captain: Another excellent question.
Loomis: Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Captain: I don't know. I couldn't say.
Loomis: Why did the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?
Captain: When are you retiring?
Loomis: Four hundred and seventy four days.
Captain: Does that include today?
Loomis: Yes it does.
Shawn Spencer: The spirits tell me your little pants are on fire.
Sins of the Fathers Chapter 9: Tombstone - S3-E9
Tombstone: Come down here and fight like a man.
Spider-Man: I don't suppose I could convince you to come up here and fight like a spider.
Jerry Edgar: Golf is a great sport.
Harry Bosch: Golf is not a great sport. If you can smoke and drink while doing it, it's not a sport.
Jim Reed: You just have to know how to arrest them and still make them like you. We call it technique.
Agent Devlin: Everybody's got a theory on the increasing violence in our society.
Agent Emmerich: My wife thinks it's the artificial hormones in beef.
Agent Devlin: What's your take?
Frank Black: I don't think it's the beef.
Police officer: It's police policy not to waste resources looking for a missing person in the first 24 hours because they usually show up on their own, and after 24 hours, if they're still missing, it usually means they're dead and we don't look for them that hard then either.
Sherlock Holmes: If you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, is the truth.
Wednesday Addams: I don't believe in heaven or hell. But I do believe in revenge. I usually serve it warm with a side of pain.
Amma Crellin: Don't tell Momma.
Denny Blood: Oi, posh bitch. Is "arseholes" all one word?
Monica Lindsey: No, it's hyphenated. As in "arse-licker"
A.D.A. Alex Cahill: How about a cruise for our honeymoon?
Ranger Cordell Walker: We've already done that.
A.D.A. Alex Cahill: That was a river raft.
Ranger Cordell Walker: Close enough.
Kessler: Who are you?
Remington Steele: Just a happy go lucky tourist out to see a bit of the world.
Neff: Is that why you've got five passports, from five different countries, in five different names?
Remington Steele: Kept trying for a good picture.