Clint Perrkins: Hey, give me that shovel. Boy, you look like a monkey fucking a football.
Wendy: I just wanted the glow. The one that they promise you on the cover of those magazines. Well, I'm calling it - pregnancy sucks. Making a human being is really hard. I have no control over my body or my emotions.
Jim Green: Have a great day.
Cindy Green: That's too much pressure.
Jim Green: Have the day you have.
Dave: I was adopted. I never knew my real dad. You could be my dad for all I know. Are you my dad?
Artie Decker: I'm awkward around those kids. I don't think they like me.
Calvin Weir-Fields: I have you. I don't need anyone else.
Ruby Sparks: That's a lot of pressure.
Marty Streb: If you're gonna lose, then I'm gonna help you lose. Deal?
Scott Voss: Deal. Let's do this. Let's lose.
Chris: If the caravan's rockin', don't come a-knockin'.
Trish: Don't choose the better man, choose the man who makes you a better woman.
Carvin: This is historic. The revolution has begun - all because this courageous woman saw an unjust world and waved her boobies at it.
Mike: Feelings are like kids. You don't want them driving the car, but you don't want to stuff them in the trunk, either.
Zibby: So, what was your major?
Jesse Fisher: I was English, with a minor in history, just to make sure I was fully unemployable.
Steve Stifler: Ladies, you'd better be working hard - you weren't hired for your looks. Actually you were. Not you.
Zoey: This is my store. This is a free earth collective. We are a vegan, feminist, non-profit cooperative operating within an anti-racist, anti-oppressive framework for people of all or no genders.
Cedric: Mike, how old is your mom?
Michael: What?
Cedric: I'm not saying it like that. No, I am. I am. It's like that. Ms. Loretta, I'm ready for the rest of the tour.
