Duncan McKay: That's from, like, an ostrich or something.
Hubs: Or a beaver.
Sleep'N Eat: Years ago, I married a widow who had a grown up daughter. My daddy visited us often, fell in love, and married her. Thusly, he became my son-in-law and my step-daughter became my mother because she was my father's wife. That's right. After that, my father's wife gave birth to a son who became my brother and my grandchild, because he was the son of my daughter. I ain't jiving! Now, accordingly, my wife was my grandmother because she was my mother's mother. Mantan, I was my wife's husband and grandchild at one and the same time. And lo and behold, as the husband of the person's grandmother is a grandfather, I became my goddamn own grandfather.
Bree Davis: You see women all day, every day. How do they keep from just runnin' together?
Dr. Sullivan "Sully" Travis, "Dr. T": I think every single woman I've ever met has got somethin' special about her, somethin' that sets her apart from the rest.
Bree Davis: Well, if a gynecologist says there's no two alike, I guess there's no two alike.
Imogen: A little soul is necessary in life.
Captain Victor Benezet: Go home. Put on a funny hat. Do whatever it is morons do.
Vanessa: I just wanna know where I belong.
Mona Hibbard: You belong in the family box.
Reinaldo Arenas: My name, for the moment, is Reinaldo Arenas.
Selma: I'm just not that kind of mother.
Gene Jezkova: Can't you be that kind of a mother?
Coach Boone: Welcome to my life, Yoast.
Joel Campbell: It's never quite that easy. You go through the door, and they're never just sitting there waiting for you with a welcoming smile on their face. Best you can do is hope they fuck up and do what you can to be there when they do.
Dr. Polly Beilman: And then blame yourself for the killings?
Joel Campbell: Oh, no. I blame the asshole who did them.
Steerpike: Why is it that some people starve and others have so much they waste it?
El Chivo: Do you want something to drink? I've got rum, water and milk.
Luis Miranda Solares: What are you gonna do with me?
El Chivo: What does that mean? rum, water or milk?
Luis Miranda Solares: My question means what it means.
Bennett: I once heard someone say: "When you dim your light, so that someone else can shine, the whole world gets darker."
Cooper: If you're still holding onto all that personal shit.
Jonathan Reeves: I don't have to hold onto anything. I got the girl.
Doreen Carter: You are so freaky.
Jack Carter: Well, we're all a little freaky, Doreen. It's those straight ones you've got to worry about.
Bob Barrenger: Only second chance I know, is the chance to make the same mistake twice.
Hunter: Buddy, if you're lookin' at me for answers - I'm flattered but, uh - you've come to the wrong place.
Damodar: Just like you thieves, always taking things that don't belong to you.