Beret Girl: Max, Max, Max. Admit defeat, and defeat will surely admit you into permanent custody, my man.
Lily, Burnett Stone's granddaughter: Magic Railroad?
Mr. C. Junior: Whatever.
Maurey Pierce: I want to explain the rules before we do this.
Sam Callahan: Do what?
Maurey Pierce: Make sex. Why else would I be here?
Sam Callahan: We're gonna perform sex now?
Maurey Pierce: After coffee.
Lou Mozell: You know, that I actually met a girl by the name of Moo Goo Gai Pan? That was her last name. Her first name was Freida. Freida Moo Goo Gai Pan. She was half-Jewish, half-Chinese. A lot of people called her the Ori-Yenta.
Turkish: We've lost gorgeous George
Brick top: Well where'd you lose him? He ain't a set of fucking car keys is he?
Bree Davis: You see women all day, every day. How do they keep from just runnin' together?
Dr. Sullivan "Sully" Travis, "Dr. T": I think every single woman I've ever met has got somethin' special about her, somethin' that sets her apart from the rest.
Bree Davis: Well, if a gynecologist says there's no two alike, I guess there's no two alike.
Sheila: Well Mr. Phipps, you are in perilous danger of turning me back into a heterosexual.
Banner in the back of Stanley's van: I'm the guy your mother warned you about.
Matthew: Enter the fuckin' dragon.
Russ: As our Jewish friends say: "Enjoy."
Dr. Anton Rudolph: You have no idea what you're up against.
Bart Parker: You don't know my men.
Dr. Anton Rudolph: This is not some garden snake you're going after. We are talking about a perfect killing machine. A 129-foot all-terrain vehicle capable of speeds exceeding 50 miles an hour with skin that can deflect an antitank round, enhanced night vision and a voracious appetite for human flesh. It will slaughter your men before they have a chance to blink.
Ryan: I like that you look nervous sometimes for no reason. And when you do, you bite your lip. I like that you probably... rifled through your closet tonight... and settled with what you started out with. I like your smile.