Da Mayor: Doctor, those that'll tell don't know, and those that know won't tell.
Earl Ramsey: Gun control is for wimps and commies. Listen, let's get one thing straight. Guns don't kill people. I do.
Captain Meissner: Convict... two things. One - I am Meissner. Two - Never fuck with Meissner. Inside.
Rennie: There is a maniac trying to kill us.
Waitress: Welcome to New York.
Ed Killifer: Freeze! Over by the trap door, old buddy.
James Bond: Is this where you put your old buddy Felix?
Ed Killifer: Not me. Chalk that one up to Sanchez and Krest.
Arnie Fromson: You can't do this. You can't abuse yourself.
John Belushi: Look, I don't pay you to be my best friend. I don't ask you what you do after six o'clock, don't ASK ME! nobody tells ME what to DO.
Arnie Fromson: You can't tell me what to do with you either. I'm not talking about business now, John. I'm talking about your life.
Aatos Laitila: If it gets any colder we'll need dynamite to break up the cheese.
Arvi Huhtala: Let Russian artillery do it for us.
Eileen Gallagher: How do you know...?
Sgt. Johnny Gallagher: God damn it, I don't know! These people can be anybody they want to be! It scares the piss out of me.
Marylou Summers: The Devil was a werewolf... Wow, that's incredible.
Jack Baker: What's happened to you? Have you been kissing ass so long, you're starting to like it?
Denis Dimbleby Bagley: My grandfather was caught molesting a wallaby in a private zoo in 1919.
Psychiatrist: A wallaby?
Denis Dimbleby Bagley: It may have been a kangaroo. I'm not sure.
Psychiatrist: You mean sexually?
Denis Dimbleby Bagley: I suppose so. He had his hand in its pouch.
Alex Grady: Tommy! No! Coach! Coach! He's gonna kill him.
Amos Reed: Let him go, Hooch! I'm sorry, Scott. I don't have the hand-strength I used to. You're OK, aren't you?
Scott Turner: Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I was looking forward to a nice quiet cup of coffee, but NOW I'M awake.
Scott McCarthy: Never sneak up on a man when he's blasting Metallica.
Ron Kovic: People say that if you don't love America, then get the hell out. Well, I love America.
Helen Downing: Back then, dinner and a movie might have gotten you into some girl's panties, but it's gonna take a lot more than that to get into mine.
Valmont: You want me to seduce a little girl, who has seen nothing, who knows nothing, who'll probably flop on her back out of simple curiosity? You don't need me for that. Anyone can do that.
Snyder: I did everything by the book, I followed my orders.
Dr. Diane Norris: Get my kit.