Jerry Beck: I'm telling you something's going on here. I'm telling you something big is happening here, and all that grabs you is my language? What the fuck is the matter with you?
Lilly: Oh, Riff, since Cindy's not feeling well, looks like you and I are gonna be partners.
Riff: No fuckin' way.
Richard Schoenfield: Hey Oppenheimer! Oppenheimer! You oughta stop playing God, 'cause you're no good at it, and the position's taken.
Rennie: There is a maniac trying to kill us.
Waitress: Welcome to New York.
Mikey: So how many cases can we get?
Spitz: Three cases. Any more and I think old Mr. Casy would-ah-know something's up, but we gotta get going, shift changes pretty soon. You gonna pull around back or should we both get busted out front?
Hughie Warriner: Don't you believe me?
Det. Sherman: Think you could go for a babe with a dick?
Det. Frank Keller: Depends on her personality, really.
Emmett Foley: When you come back a certified hero... it kind of raises people's expectations. Makes them think you're a big guy.
Trevor: I've heard better singing from a mongoose with throat cancer.
Beth: You can't walk... and you're getting worse.
Martin Brundle: I'm getting...better.
Sybok: Consider yourselves my prisoners.
Talbot: Prisoners? We're already prisoners here on this worthless lump of rock! What possible value could we be to you?
Sybok: Nimbus III may be a worthless lump of rock, but it DOES have one unique treasure. It's the only place in the entire galaxy that has the three of you.
Alex Grady: It's late Tommy.
Tommy Lee: Dae Han is training just as hard.
Alex Grady: Yeah, but even Dae Han get sleep.
Tommy Lee: Are you sure about that?
Capt. Fairbourne: If you were a communist how could you be king?
Learoyd: Only a communist would think of it.
Police Chief Spiro T. Edsel: Use unnecessary force, if necessary.
Susie Diamond: L stayed at the Hartford one time. You should see the rooms. All satin and velvet. And the bed... royal blue, trimmed in lace clean as snow. Hard to believe a room like that don't change your life. But it don't. The bed may be magic, but the mirror isn't. Still wake up the same old Susie.
Horace Pinker: This BarcaLounger's gonna kick your ass, boy.
Maxwell Smart: Because at this very moment, this warehouse is being surrounded by one hundred cops with Doberman pinschers. Would you believe it? A hundred cops with Doberman pinschers.
Nicholas Dimente: I find that hard to believe.
Maxwell Smart: Would you believe ten security guards and a bloodhound?
Nicholas Dimente: I don't think so.
Maxwell Smart: How about a Boy Scout with rabies?
Captain Harris: Proctor! You have been singing Christmas songs for the entire five hours of this stakeout. And Christmas is a good four months away. If you sing so much as one more note... I will shoot you.
Wallace: No cheese, Gromit! Not a bit in the house.