Elizabeth Farmer: I'm convinced that our marriage has been one of mutual betrayals. I know it! you know it! Even Yellow Dog knows it.
Andy Farmer: I know it and you know it. Yellow Dog doesn't even know what town he's in.
Jack Sayer: You're huntin' it, ain't ya? Yeah, you're huntin' it, all right. Just like me.
Dr. Loomis: What are you hunting, Mr. Sayer?
Jack Sayer: Apocalypse, End of the World, Armageddon. It's always got a face and a name. I've been huntin' the bastard for 30 years, give or take. Come close a time or two. Too damn close! You can't kill damnation, Mister. It don't die like a man dies.
Dr. Loomis: I know that, Mr. Sayer.
Ernest: I have lived my life in the fast lane.
Colin Childress: He who has wisdom, wonders not of the beast, for nothing in hell lives without Man's consent. Woe unto you that gives the beast form. To contemplate evil, is to ask evil home.
Tracy: When we get out of here, Joel's going to be carrying his balls home in a knapsack.
Chris: Remind me never to piss you off, Tracy.
Vance: We do not want to end up with a low potassium level.
Pee-wee: Duh, Vance! You'd think I never went to agricultural junior college.
The Tall Man: You think that when you die, you go to Heaven. You come to us.
Wyatt Earp: How come you told Cheryl where I'm staying?
Tom Mix: Because she asked. And I figured if she asked you, you'd tell her.
Tara: They are gardeners and carpenters, they are not tomato men.
Janis Zuckerman: I'm looking for a guy named Louie, fuzzy hair, crooked teeth, bug eyes. Has he been around lately?
Girl Punk: Suck shit through a tube.
Sinclair: Man, if we get outta this thing, I want you to come to the States. I'll show you some stuff that you'll never believe.
Vodovsky: No way, my friend. I'm told in the States they shoot Communists in the streets.
Sinclair: Hell, man. In Detroit, my hometown, they shoot everybody in the streets.
Garfield: In my first life, I formulated many of my likes and dislikes. I disliked my rock bed. On the other hand, you wouldn't believe the size of the pterodon drumsticks.
Angela: Too bad they haven't figured out a way to make french fries nutritious. I'm a nut when it comes to french fries.
Lt. Nikolai: You lied to me General.
General Vortek: I sent you on a mission... to help an oppresed people.
Lt. Nikolai: But you didn't tell me who the oppressors were, did you?
General Vortek: Nikolai... you were, SPETZNATS.
Lt. Nikolai: I AM SPETZNAS... but I'm no longer one of you.
Babcock: I've got a gun.
Charlie Harrison: I've got a fishing rod. Lets go camping.
Donald Blake: You are David Banner, aren't you? If you're not, I'll just apologize profusely and get out of here. I just couldn't let you zap yourself with that thing until I was sure.
Doctor David Banner: Who are you?
Donald Blake: You had a beard the last time I knew you. Harvard, ten years ago? You were the guest genius at the time, the resident Merlin and me, I was... I was in trouble a lot.
Doctor David Banner: Blake? Donald Blake?
Donald Blake: The one and only.
Lorna: You are certifiable! What is this? Some sort of smart-ass joke? You're taking cooking?
Michael: I want to learn how to cook.
Lorna: Yeah, right. You have some burning desire to learn how to make apple brown betty.
Michael: What are you doing here if you think so highly of it?
Lorna: Well, they wouldn't let me take auto mechanics, and I didn't have time to take the issue to the Supreme Court.
Albert: Jackson, why did you have to bring me along in the first place?
Action Jackson: You remind me of a old friend.
Albert: Then why didn't you bring your old friend?
Action Jackson: He's dead.
Albert: Damn, man why did you have to tell me that?
Wheel: The Constitution wasn't written on an etch-a-sketch, but every once in a while you gotta twist the knobs a little.
Ruysdael: I wanted him to be happy. I didn't know his intention.
Eric Visser: Revenge on society. Innocent people had to be slaughtered.
Ruysdael: I can't believe it. He is sick and so is society.