Tom Dobbs: If Mama Cass had shared a lunch with Karen Carpenter, both would still be alive today... What do I think of gay marriage? I believe gays have every right to be just as miserable as the rest of us.
Marilyn Dean: Go and show Gary your immaculate canvas, and another man eager to paint it.
Ella: Rick! I was dancing with the prince and my dress disappeared.
Rick: Ok, too much information, but thank you.
Rory: Ever since nursery school, every single waking moment of every single day has been scheduled. So what do I want to do? Nothing.
Bartleby Gaines: Cheap, zen, beautiful. I like it.
Ashley Albright: Here we go again. Maggie you've known me since Seventh Grade, right? Okay, will you please tell her that I'm not lucky.
Maggie: Well, you were voted prom queen at Franklin High.
Ashley Albright: So?
Maggie: We went to Jefferson.
Walter Nichols: We're going on a ship, and ships don't sink.
Audrey Parker-Nichols: What about the Titanic?
Walter Nichols: That was just a movie.
Audrey Parker-Nichols: Yeah, based on a true story.
Walter Nichols: Really?
Eli: I've got two chicks back at my place who think I'm Moby.
Henry: You fucker.
Angus Oldfield: Actually it was a sperm sample.
Henry: You wanker.
Kathy Johnson: Why don't we just buy some condoms and jerk off some homeless guys. Oh, like that didn't occur to anyone else?
Stephane: The brain is the most complex thing in the universe, and it's right behind the nose.
Park Hie-bong: In a word... her birth was an accident, and so was her death. Old people have always said... that an animal which kills a human... should be torn limb from limb. That it's a human's duty to do so. Until I slit that beast's stomach... and at least find Hyun-seo's body... I'll never leave this world in peace.
Omer: You have been Omerized.
Corey Taft: Don't make assumptions about the talent. Don't assume the talent can hear well.
Male Receptionist: You made me want to be a woman.
Him: I have that effect on people.