Lilly Moscovitz: Does this popcorn taste like pears?
Mia Thermopolis: Mmm, Genovian specialty.
Jenna: You are rude, and mean, and sloppy, and frizzy - and I don't like you at all.
Detective Nakagawa: It is said in Japan that when a person dies in extreme sorrow or rage, the emotion remains, becoming a stain upon that place. Death becomes a part of that place, killing everything it touches. Once you have become a part of it, it will never let you go.
Mrs. Puff: We paid 9 dollars to see this?
Sandy Cheeks: I paid 10.
Mr. Ditkovich: If promises were crackers, my daughter would be fat.
Stan Lloyd: It's okay to be happy to see me. Just because you're English doesn't mean you need to hide your emotions.
Max Burdett: I'm Irish. We let people know how we feel. Now fuck off.
Mort: I don't care. I'm just gonna smoke. I'm just gonna totally smoke. I'll finish these, go to the store and get a brand-new pack, smoke the shit out of that one.
Stepford Wife: I'm going to use a pinecone as the baby Jesus this year.
Bobbi Markowitz: And I'm going to attach a pinecone to my vibrator and have a really merry Christmas.
Jack Byrnes: We use the Ferber method.
Bernie Focker: We use the Focker method. We hugged and kissed that little boy like there was no tomorrow. We Fockerized him.
Sykes: Ernie! Bernie! I want you to find the deepest, darkest hole in the ocean, and when you do, dig deeper and put him in it.
Paul Rusesabagina: There will be no rescue, no intervention for us. We can only save ourselves. Many of you know influential people abroad, you must call these people. You must tell them what will happen to us... say goodbye. When you say goodbye, say it as if you are reaching through the phone and holding their hand. Let them know that if they let go of that hand, you will die. We must shame them into sending help.
Nate Johnson: Nikki, this better be FTD, cuz this Russian tail is old enough to be yo' grandaddy.
Nikki Johnson: Not mom's big daddy.
Stacie: Who are you?
Yancy: Yancy. I'm Yancy. We had P.E. together all year.
Stacie: You're orange.
Farrah: Oh my god, Yancy, you are orange, you have too much presto tan.
Alex: Love makes you do crazy things, insane things, things in a million years you never thought you'd see yourself do. There you are doing it... can't help it.
Madam Suliman: It's time to put an end to this idiotic war.
Tommy Johnson: What else are you gonna do on a Saturday? Sit in your fuckin' armchair wankin' off to Pop Idols? Then try and avoid your wife's gaze as you struggle to come to terms with your sexless marriage? Then go and spunk your wages on kebabs, fruit machines and brasses? Fuck that for a laugh! I know what I'd rather do. Tottenham away, love it.
Jesus: Forgive them, Father. They know not what they do.