Natalie: Hello, David. I mean "sir." Shit, I can't believe I've just said that. Oh, and now I've gone and said "shit" - twice. I'm so sorry, sir.
Prime Minister: It's fine, it's fine. You could've said "fuck", and then we'd have been in real trouble.
Natalie: Thank you, sir. I did have an awful premonition that I was going to fuck up on the first day. Oh, piss it!
Tracy: He was crippled, but only his body was cracked. It's not simple, nor is it an easy matter to explain. "Let's just leave it at that," she says and closes the holy book of lies. She covers her eyes, denying to herself what she thought happened.
Martini: Signora, between Austria and Italy, there is a section of the Alps called the Semmering. It is an impossibly steep, very high part of the mountains. They built a train track over these Alps to connect Vienna and Venice. They built these tracks even before there was a train in existence that could make the trip. They built it because they knew some day, the train would come.
Lilly: She is not a Christian. My mama said hollering in a church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a Cadillac.
Mack: Shame what this town's come to.
Charley Waite: You could do something about it.
Mack: What? We're freighters. Ralph here's a shopkeeper.
Charley Waite: You're men, ain't you?
Mack: I didn't raise my boys just to see 'em killed.
Charley Waite: Well you may not know this, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dying.
Kate: How many Lizzies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Hmmm, I don't know, but it only takes one to screw up a graduation.
Will: You wanna call me "Daddy" while I fuck you, huh?
Aileen: I'll try. Why? You like to fuck your kids?
Julian Mercer: When something happens to you that hasn't happened before, don't you at least have to find out what it is?
Matthew: I think you prefer when the world "together" means not "a million," but just two.
Stifler: Well polish my nuts and serve me a milkshake.
Freddy Bender: Objection, Your Honor! Strangling the witness.
Judge Marva Munson: I'm going to allow it.
Darrell: Eva's sisters gave her a cross with Jesus on it for her birthday, the next day Jesus was gone.
Detective Malloy: Some women give terrible blowjobs. No rhythm at all. No sense of cock whatsoever.
Henry Dashwood: For me, it's just a stop on the campaign trail, and for Glynnis it's a chance to launch Clarissa on society.
Daphne Reynolds: Launch her? You make her sound like a ship.
Henry Dashwood: No, in Clarissa's case it's more like an intercontinental ballistic missile.
Le tueur: You drive a woman crazy. You little slut.
Lou: So my boss, he was talking to me about how many sick days I've taken. And I was like, you know 'Don't go there, ' you know. But he kept on about wanting to see some kind of a doctor's note or something. And I said 'Look, I'm seriously serious. You don't want to go there. He kept talking and talking and being such a nag, and I just blacked out. I blacked out. And I woke up, and I was standing over him and I was screaming "I told you not to go there! I told you not to go there!"
Ray: She always does this to me, she's not coming. Ow.
Roma Schleine: Well, if you would stop wiggling your ass, it wouldn't have fallen off in the first place.
Ben: Hanging with her for 10 days is gonna be no problem.
Tony: Right. That's only nine days longer than you've ever spent with any other chick, huh?
