Ace Ventura: Aaalll righty then.
Eric Draven: It can't rain all the time.
Howard Payne: See, I'm in charge here! I drop this stick, and they pick your friend here up with a sponge! Are you ready to die, friend?
Harry: Fuck you!
Howard Payne: Oh! In two hundred years we've gone from "I regret but I have one life to give for my country" to "Fuck you!"?
George: Excuse me, sir, can I help you? Oh, Mr. Swinton, I didn't recognize you.
Stewart: I'm here to see Miss Alden, George.
George: Well, I'm afraid I'll have to call. May I ask your business with Miss Alden?
Stewart: My business is pleasure, George. Does she look like the fuck of the decade or what?
Carol: Oh, I guess we should stop, 'cause Harold has to pee.
Rudy Travis: Get back in the front. Get back up there with Harold! Get up there.
Harold Carvey, DVM: I don't want to play... this game... anymore.
Rudy Travis: You pee in your pants.
Mike Swale: I'm starting to feel like a.
Bridget Gregory: Sex object?
David Stephens: And how would you react, then, if I told you I was the Antichrist?
Bison: Dee Jay, has the AN deposited the twenty million in my Swiss bank?
[Dee Jay checks and finds the account empty.]
Dee Jay: Hell no, General.
Billy: I stole cars at school. Take them over at break. Leave it parked outside the gates and at the end of the day I was the only kid to drive home. I was a fucking hero.
Lt. Jake Stone: Don't ever throw a cat on me again.
Captain Ramirez: The chicken is in the pot, over.
Clark: Cook it.