Phaneron

I'm Spelling as Fast as I Can - S14-E12

Mayor Quimby: Lisa, with second place, you're the biggest winner this town has ever had. Before you, it was the woman who dated Charles Grodin. (00:20:22)

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Sideshow Bob Roberts - S6-E5

Campaign ad narrator: Mayor Quimby supports revolving door prisons. Mayor Quimby even released Sideshow Bob, a man twice convicted of attempted murder. Can you trust a man like Mayor Quimby? Vote Sideshow Bob for Mayor.

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Homer at the Bat - S3-E17

Barney: And I say England's greatest Prime Minister was Lord Palmerston.
Wade Boggs: Pitt the Elder.
Barney: Lord Palmerston!
Wade Boggs: Pitt the Elder!
Barney: OK, you asked for it, Boggs! [Punches him out.]
Moe: Yeah, that's showing him, Barney! Pitt the Elder.
Barney: Lord Palmerston! [Punches Moe out.]

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Future-Drama - S16-E15

Principal Skinner: Bart, now that you've graduated, I can finally say this: you really press my cider! [Crowd gasps in disbelief.]

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Simpson Safari - S12-E17

Agnes Skinner: Start over. I want everything in one bag.
Squeaky-voiced Teen: Yes ma'am.
Agnes Skinner: But I don't want the bag to be heavy.
Squeaky-voiced Teen: I don't think that's possible.
Agnes Skinner: What are you, the possible police? Just do it.

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Krusty Gets Kancelled - S4-E22

Anthony Kiedis: You told our agent this place holds 30,000 people.
Moe: It does. We had 30,000 here last night. Now play, the audience is getting restless.
Barney: We want Chilly Willy! We want Chilly Willy!
Bart: Hey, Red Hot Chili Peppers, would you guys like to appear on a Krusty the Clown special?
Flea: Sure, if you can get us out of this gig.
Bart: No problemo. Hey Moe, look over there.
Moe: [Turns around and looks at the wall.] What? What am I looking at? I don't see nothin'. [Bart sneaks the Red Hot Chili Peppers out of the bar.] I'm gonna stop lookin' soon. What? What, is that it?
Homer: Hey Moe, can I look too?
Moe: Sure, but it'll cost you.
Homer: My wallet's in the car.
Moe: He is so stupid. And now back to the wall.

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Kill the Alligator and Run - S11-E19

Homer: Guess how many boobs I saw today, Marge. Fifteen.

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Viva Ned Flanders - S10-E10

Homer: [Screams] The Moody Blues!
Graeme Edge: Cold-hearted Homer ditching his wife, while ancient Ned runs for his life.
Justin Hayward: Chips of red and blue and white, but we decide which...
John Lodge: Can the poems, it's ass-whooping time!
Ray Thomas: I want fatty!

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The Canine Mutiny - S8-E20

Moe: You gotta give me back my floor. The customers are walking around on the pipes.
Repo Agent: Hey, next time pay your bills.
Moe: But I don't want to!

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The Otto Show - S3-E22

Otto: Hey landlord, some clown changed my locks, padlocked the door, and put up an eviction notice.
Landlord: Yeah, that was me.
Otto: You!? But why?
Landlord: Because you haven't paid your rent.
Otto: Well, can I at least get my stuff?
Landlord: All I found in there was a jar of mustard, and a couple of old cycle magazines.
Otto: Wow! I have mustard!?

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Homer the Smithers - S7-E17

Smithers: I've got to find a replacement who won't outshine me. Perhaps if I search the employee evaluations for the word "incompetent." 714 names! Ha, better be more specific. "Lazy, clumsy, dimwitted, monstrously ugly." [The computer again displays 714 matches.] Ah, nuts to this. I'll just go get Homer Simpson.

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Lisa the Simpson - S9-E17

Announcer: We now return to "When Buildings Collapse" on "Non-Stop Fox."
[Bart and Homer cheer.]
Bart: Hey Lis', wanna join us?
Homer: Room for one more.
Bart: We're watching the TV.
Narrator: Man has always loved his buildings. But what happens when the buildings say "No more!"?

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Lisa on Ice - S6-E8

Jimbo: Nice PJ's, Simpson. Did your mommy buy 'em for ya?
Bart: Of course she did. Who else would have?
Jimbo: Alright, Simpson, you win this round!

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Grade School Confidential - S8-E19

Bart: You are never gonna guess what I saw at Martin's party after you guys left. You know that playhouse? Well, I...
Principal Skinner: Good gravy!
Cafeteria worker: Oh, thank you. It's just brown and water.

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Tree House of Horror X - S11-E4

Professor Frink: In episode BF12, you were battling barbarians while riding a winged Appaloosa. but in the very next scene, my dear, you're clearly atop a winged Arabian. Please to explain it.
Lucy Lawless: Ah, yeah, well, whenever you notice something like that, a wizard did it.
Professor Frink: I see, all right, yes, but in episode AG4...
Lucy Lawless: Wizard!
Professor Frink: Ah, for glavin' out loud!

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Tree House of Horror IX - S10-E4

Chief Wiggum: Homer Simpson, you're under arrest for the murders of Moe Szyslak and Apu Nahasa... pasa... uh, just Moe. Just Moe.

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Bart vs. Australia - S6-E16

Homer: [Looking at Uruguay on a globe] Heh heh heh heh! Look at this country: U R Gay.

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Milhouse Doesn't Live Here Anymore - S15-E12

Apu: Attention American bar devils: it's our anniversary. Free drinks for everyone.
Homer: That's great! I'm honored to drink to Apu and, uh, Apulina. You know, Marge and I have an anniversary coming up.
Apu: I have given Manjula many gifts, including a bouquet of flowers, diamond earrings, and we're going to see Paris... Hilton, in Paris... Texas, on our way to Paris... France.

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Margical History Tour - S15-E11

Homer: And now, the star of our show: my son, Mozart. He makes Bach turn back, Haydn go into hidin', and, well, those are the only ones there have been so far.

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HOMR - S12-E9

Homer: Hey Flanders, headin' for church? Well, I thought I could save you a little time.
Flanders: Ooh, found a new shortcut?
Homer: Better. I was working on a flat-tax proposal and I accidentally proved there's no god.

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