Eloise: Can I say something? And, and this comes from a place of total humility. With the acknowledgment that my life is a day-by-day experiment in... really bad decisions. But, er... you're really messed up.
Catherine Stewart: My husband's cheating on me. At least, I think he is.
Qwerty Doolittle: In my profession, I see death every day. Some by accident, some by sickness, but some through despair. These are the ones I wish I could have helped.
Lord Henry Wotton: I must ask you though what is your secret?
Dorian Gray: If Itold you I'd have to kill you.
Connor: You need sortin' out, you do.
Mia: So you keep sayin' But you're nothing to me, so why should I listen?
Tod: Mr. E, I talked to the lawyer guy upstairs and he confirmed my hunch, uh, about the whole stabbing of Mr. Whitefeather thing. It's a definite no can do from a legal standpoint.
Oliver: Wow, from here it kinda looks like you're wearing a stryper T-shirt.
Bliss Cavendar: Stryper? Yeah, 80's christian heavy metal. I mean in the name of jesus we rock.
Sean Combs: Yo, he got sex appeal like LL?
Wayne Barrow: A little bigger than that.
Sean Combs: What, like Heavy D?
Wayne Barrow: He's a little darker than that.
Wayne Barrow: He look like Wesley Snipes?
Wayne Barrow: Oh, he ain't Wesley.
Amelia Earhart: Who wants a life imprisoned in safety?
Paloma Josse: Planning to die doesn't mean I let myself go like a rotten vegetable. What matters isn't the fact of dying or when you die. It's what you're doing at that precise moment.
Jennifer Strunk: Would you like to meet Charlton Heston? He's our scorpion. Every night we throw in something new to him and watch him kill it. Daddy says it's like a Coliseum. Daddy says he wants to throw you into the Coliseum.
George: No kidding. Why?
Jennifer Strunk: Well, he says you're light in your loafers. But you're not even wearing any loafers.
Amy: I tell you the good news and spare you the bad. Isn't that what mom used to do for you when we were kids?
Nick Twisp and Francois Dillinger: I'm gonna wrap your legs around my head and wear you like the crown that you are.
Nick Twisp and Francois Dillinger: If that's OK with you.
Meryl Morgan: Now that we're on the jet, can you tell us where we're going?
U.S. Marshal Henderson: Ray, Wyoming.
Paul Morgan: Is that anywhere near Phil, Wyoming?
Edward Dalton: Welcome back to humanity. Now you get to die.
Vince Rizzo: Did you sleep outside last night?
Vince Jr.: No, no, no. I did heroin with a bunch of prostitutes at the Plaza Hotel. I'm thinking of becoming a pimp.
Vince Rizzo: Good. I'll see you later.
César Luciani: Fill out a parole application. I'll have it treated in priority. In the meantime, you can go on leave. You go out for me, you come back, and you get paid. What do you say?
Malik El Djebena: What's the risk?
César Luciani: There is no risk. Staying here is the only risk.
Sam Shapiro: Writers are vampires. I'm waiting for the right girl to come along and make me a human being.
Max Brogan: I've never been invited to a shunning before. What is this? Something you guys brought over with you?
Zahra Baraheri: I didn't bring it, I was born here. I'm the only one in this family who's an actual American.