Leon Tyler: We need to cauterize the wound.
Thelma Bates: How do we do that?
Leon Tyler: Well, in star wars they used the light saber.
FBI Agent Max Canary: If I'm not mistaken, she just cut off your balls, Derek.
Derek Jennings: Just the one, Max. Just the one.
Dr. Max Hudson: If I start to go crazy can you... take care of me?.. In the back of the head.
Diana Skouris: You won't even see it coming... Dr. Hudson?
Dr. Max Hudson: I just gave you permission to blow my head off. You can call me Max.
Donald Trump: It's a little bit like: watch somebody sell their used car and not wash it. You can spend $10 washing the car and get another $200 for the car. And I've seen guys, they're selling cars that are dirty, and I say, "That guy is a loser."
Ava Gregory: You are not the only one who lost somebody.
Antubis: You do me a solid, I do you a solid.
Cooper Day: You gotta stop bein' the bunny and step up to the plate.
Abby Day: That's an absurd sentence.
Cooper Day: Absurd or brilliant?
Johnny Drama: I've been working steady for the past twelve years, minus the last three.
Joey and the Dream Girl (2) - S1-E9
Michael: You're a hot girl. Hot girls get stuff for free.
Joey: Yeah, it's true. It's in the Constitution.
Alex: Look, I know what I am. I'm not a hot girl. I'm cute.
Michael: You're a hot girl that doesn't know she's hot. Joey was telling me about those.
Alex: No, I know hot girls. My sister is one of them.
Michael: "The even hotter sister" – one of four ways a girl doesn't realise she’s hot. Along with "went to a girls' school", "used to be fat", and "is blind."
Joey: You have learned well, young Michael.
Wallace: I liked the other place you worked better.
Veronica: Think maybe that's because we had food there?
Super Nanny - S2-E7
Super Nanny: What's going on here?
Toot: Oh, nothing. Captain Shero was just trying to take my barrette.
Captain Hero: It's pronounced Hero. The S is silent, you hithead.
Dr. Macartney: So tell me, why are you wearing a blouse?
Dr. Guilaume Secretan: What?
Dr. Macartney: It's a blouse, isn't it?
Dr. Guilaume Secretan: Fuck off, it's designer.
Dr. Macartney: What, Laura Ashley?
Old Gregg: Under closer inspection I realised it was a funky ball of tits from outer space.