Pnub: Don't you watch the news?
Anton: I hate that fucking show.
Miles Logan: Hey, this is the police. Move your busted-ass vehicle. Move, move, move, move. This is the LAPD. We'll pop one in your ass. We got guns and shit.
Dino Velvet: If there was no honor among perverts and pornographers, the whole fucking business would fall apart.
Christmas Jones: Doctor Jones. Christmas Jones. And, no jokes. I've heard them all.
James Bond: I don't know any doctor jokes.
Dr. Bill Harford: Now, where exactly are we going... exactly?
Gayle: Where the rainbow ends.
Dr. Bill Harford: Where the rainbow ends?
Nuala: Don't you want to go where the rainbow ends?
Dr. Bill Harford: Well, now that depends where that is.
Gayle: Well, let's find out.
Val Resnick: The problem with kicking a Chow's ass is an hour later you wanna do it again.
Maggie Witzky: Why are you doing this?
Tom Witzky: Water softens up the dirt.
Cole Sear: I see dead people.
Agent: Do you have a history of emotional problems, Mr. Wigand?
Jeffrey Wigand: Yes. Yes, I do. I get extremely emotional when assholes put bullets in my mailbox.
Dinger: Why did you join the Army?
Andy McNab: To keep out of trouble.
Dinger: So your thought if you joined up they'd be no more trouble?
Andy McNab: Best thing I ever did. Never been in trouble since.
Dinger: What the bloody hell do you call this?
Harry: Shut the hell up, Francis, or I won't tell anyone where you are, and that would suck for you.
Ted: It hurts. I think it's infected.
Allegra: No, it's not infected. It's just excited. It wants action.
Ted: But I really don't think I want action! Me, I mean. The bearer of the excited bio-port.
Detective McBain: I think I made the age-old mistake: Never trust a beautiful woman.
Vinny: You fuckin' make me sick, you fuckin' slut.
Dionna: I am a slut? You're calling me a slut? You lowlife piece of fuckin' shit - you fucked - my - cousin! You didn't think I knew about that! I smelled her pussy juice all over your fuckin' face! You fuckin' sick bastard! How dare you? And all this time I'm thinking there's something wrong with me! You perverted sick fuck.
Jimmy Sands: Clip their wings? Man, could you just shoot their damn heads off? And don't miss.
Alan Mann: I can't fart loud enough to express my opinion.