Norville: You know, for kids.
Doug Chesnic: Don't you see? If he is involved, then her life is worthless, you understand? They had to fucking kill her.
Herbert Cadbury: Well... I'm already wanted for attempted murder, escaping from jail, and blowing up an aircraft. Breaking and entering sounds right up my alley. Let's kick some butt, shall we?
Diane Pazinski: Let's.
Frank Wheeler: Which brings us to... intercourse! Can I have a volunteer?
Senior in restaurant #1: If you have job, you wear the pants.
Capt. Jason Briggs: Is there a problem with your privates, Private?
John Slade: The name's Slade.
Julian Rogers: Super. Here's an idea. Why don't you spell it out for me so I can get it right on your tombstone.
Heather: Barry, I saw you, you were kissing her.
Barry: Once, I kissed her once! God, it's like I can't talk to my friends anymore, I can't believe how posessive you are.
Heather: Oh right, I guess that's why you were feeling her up?
Barry: Look, guys need sex. It's bad for you if you get all worked up and then not get it, you can get "prostrate" cancer. Is that what you want?
Carl: You know Ray, since your kid's moved in, the food's gotten better.
Comuter Voice: Ralph and Damien sleep butt to face, butt to face, butt to face.
Peter Brackett: Where did you say you were from? Bitchville?
Nurse: Oh my goodness, you gave me the willies! You look like that Dracula guy.
Bela Lugosi: My name is Bela Lugosi... and I wish to commit myself.
Nurse: For what reason?
Bela Lugosi: I have been a drug addict for twenty years. I need help.
Birdie: Hey, can I borrow your mother? My Aunt is coming for dinner and she's always getting on my nerves.
Lt. Jake Stone: Don't ever throw a cat on me again.
Dr. Alex Hesse: I've noticed that the side effects of pregnancy are greatly amplified... With the dosage of Expectane that l've required. The morning sickness, the mood swings. Sleepiness, sexual appetite.
Larry: Sexual appetite?
Dr. Alex Hesse: Yesterday, just scooping the middle out of a honeydew melon gave me a - A "Steifen."
Larry: A what? Oh. That's normal. I get 'em all the time.
Yvonne Biasi: Who wants ice cream on their pie? Who wants pie?
Kitty Potter: This is fucking fruitcake time. I mean - is that fashion, is it? I mean is there a message out there? I mean you got lot of naked people wandering around here.
Doctor: Mr. Belrose?
Tick: Yes?
Doctor: Congratulations. It's a boy.