Will Graham: I thought you might be curious to see if you're smarter than the person I'm looking for.
Hannibal Lecktor: Then, by implication, you think you're smarter than me, since it was you who caught me.
Will Graham: No. I know that I'm not smarter than you.
Hannibal Lecktor: Then how did you catch me?
Will Graham: You had disadvantages.
Hannibal Lecktor: What disadvantages?
Will Graham: You're insane.
Guilford: Tell me, did you see his chest?
Jane: Yes, it was marked.
Guilford: No, it wasn't. It was branded. A mark burnt into him with a red-hot iron.
Tommy Hook: That wild Indian picture happens to be stylin', you don't know what you're talkin' about.
James Leeds: Do you think there's someplace where we can meet that's not in silence and not in sound?
Zarabeth: Hang loose, stay cool, and don't forget your psychic humor.
Donna Mildred Martin: The only advice my Mom ever gave me was, "Don't live in the same city as your parents."
David Basner: What crappy advice. I can't get my parents to move.
Arabella McGee: You're welcome, dildo-nose.
Hunt Stevenson: Afterwards we have a few beers and piss for distance.
Kazihiro: For us it's accuracy.
Seth Brundle: I think you're making a mistake. I think you really want to talk to me.
Ronnie: Sorry, I have three other interviews to do before this party's over.
Seth Brundle: Yeah, but they're not working on something that'll change the world as we know it.
Ronnie: They say they are.
Seth Brundle: Yeah, but they're lying. I'm not.
Air Commodore Colonel William Raymond: You see, Biggles is your Time-Twin.
Jim Ferguson: Time-Twin? Do you have anything stronger than coffee?
Ivan: So it is you, son, is it not?
Jason Stillwell: But this time it will be different. Russian.
Hercule Poirot: Have you ever noticed a secret passage that does not start in the library?
Hoops McCann: Will you watch where you're going! We're heading for the docks.
George Calamari: We've gotta make the boat.
Hoops McCann: Boat? What boat?
George Calamari: What, did you think we were driving to Nantucket? Come on, it's an island.
Hoops McCann: You never mentioned any boats! I hate boats! I'm not getting on any boat.
George Calamari: I beg to differ.
Grand Duke Cyril Romanov: We do not wish to be vindictive to this woman, but we will not tolerate this folly any longer.
Reporter: May we quote you?
Grand Duke Cyril Romanov: Quote me! You can put it on the headline.
Bobby Shy: When a man pulls shit on me he is either very brave or very stoned. Which one are you?
Eddie Jillette: I know the secret to Heaven.
Joe Collins: Oh, yeah, what's that?
Eddie Jillette: A girl with freckles on her tits.
Keith: Testy! You wanna know why I'm testy? I'll tell you why I'm testy. Today I was nearly hung, I got into a fight with a psychotic albino, I met a human pin cushion in the bathroom, I ate a cockroach, my best friend disappears and then I'm nearly assassinated by a runaway elevator! I've HAD A BAD DAY.