Louden Swain: But all I ever settled for is that we're born to live and then to die, and... we got to do it alone, each in his own way. And I guess that's why we got to love those people who deserve it like there's no tomorrow. 'Cause when you get right down to it - there isn't.
Tree Trimmer: Now that's a real shame when folks be throwin' away a perfectly good white boy like that.
Wyatt: By the way, why are we wearing bras on our heads?
Gary: It's ceremonial.
[Later, after Wyatt talks to Chet, Wyatt begins to leave the kitchen and Chet sees him wearing women's underwear.]
Chet: Like your panties.
Wyatt: [walking back into kitchen] It's a joke, Chet. Really.
Chet: No. That is not a joke. That is a severe behavioral disorder. Next thing you know you'll be wearing a bra on your head.
The Lord of Darkness: You think you have won! What is light without dark? What are you without me? I am a part of you all. You can never defeat me. We are brothers eternal.
Sam Ransom: Is that your head speaking, or another part of your anatomy?
Charley Partanna: Do I ice her? Do I marry her?
Cay: Vivian, we have to get out of here, you know. Stand up. Take a walk. Have a Coke. Window shop?
Cecil Vyse: I have no profession. My attitude - quite an indefensible one - is that as long as I am no trouble to anyone, I have the right to do as I like. It is, I dare say, an example of my decadence.
Karen Blixen: If I know a song of Africa, of the giraffe and the African new moon lying on her back, of the plows in the fields and the sweaty faces of the coffee pickers, does Africa know a song of me? Will the air over the plain quiver with a color that I have had on, or the children invent a game in which my name is, or the full moon throw a shadow over the gravel of the drive that was like me, or will the eagles of the Ngong Hills look out for me?
Jack: Get the hell out of here now.
Fat Man: You get out of here fella. I'm trying to watch the Smurfs.
Jack: You're trying to watch the Smurfs?
Fat Man: Yeah.
Jack: Did you see the one where Papa Smurf took a crutch and smashed the shit out of a guy with a red hat? Did you see that one? You want to see that one? (Fat Man runs away).
Chris Knight: Do you mind if I name my first child after you? "Dipshit Knight" has a nice ring to it.
Insane Prisoner: The Mouse? He left our house. No mouse today, he's run away. To ease the pain, he... he's down the drain.
Caesar: I will reason with him, I'll appeal to his better nature.
Rooney: Oh, you're gonne reason with a grown man in a dress?
Gene Harbrough: You may not be the biggest stud, Jonathan. But, at least you have a family.
Jonathan Bellah: You can have my brother.
Alison: What are you doing?
Gib: I'm going to bed.
Alison: Not with me you're not.
Gib: I'm not going to bed with you, I'm going to bed in a bed you happen to be in also.
[Eli is trying to teach John how to milk a cow.]
Eli Lapp: You've never had your hands on a teat before?
John Book: Not one this big.
Joan Wilder: My heart just isn't in it. I mean, romance just doesn't seem real to me anymore.
Gloria: Real? You don't write real - you write about people that sail off into the god damn sunset.
Joan Wilder: Well, what about the next day, when the sun comes up?
Gloria: There is no next day! That's why it's a romance. You've got to stop confusing real life with a romantic novel.
Gil's Agent: Tom Baxter's come down off the screen and he's running around New Jersey... Nobody knows how it happened, but he's done it.
Gil Shepherd: How can he do that? It's not physically possible.
Gil's Agent: In New Jersey anything can happen.
Lynne: Velcro. Next to the Walkman and Tab it is the coolest invention of the 20th century.