Justice: A wise man once said, Look at the ocean and realise that no matter how famous you are or how much money you make know that you'll never be as important as the ocean.
Robert Kincaid: This kind of certainty comes but once in a lifetime.
Flint Sky: Those people in the forest, what did you see on them?
Jaguar Paw: I do not understand.
Flint Sky: Fear. Deep rotting fear. They were infected by it. Did you see? Fear is a sickness. It will crawl into the soul of anyone who engages it. It has tainted your peace already. I did not raise you to see you live with fear. Strike it from your heart. Do not bring it into our village.
Tiffany: I was a slut. There will always be a part of me that is dirty and sloppy, but I like that, just like all the other parts of myself. I can forgive. Can you say the same for yourself, fucker? Can you forgive? Are you capable of that?
Evelyn: Who are we if we can't protect them? We have to protect them.
P.T. Barnum: No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else.
Deb: What are you drawing?
Napoleon Dynamite: A liger.
Deb: What's a liger?
Napoleon Dynamite: It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... Bred for its skills in magic.
Alice: Where is this love? I can't see it, I can't touch it. I can't feel it. I can hear it. I can hear some words, but I can't do anything with your easy words.
Doc McGhee: I have managed the Scorpions, Bon Jovi, Skid Row, kiss. I had been dragged through the deepest shit with all kinds of mentally ill people. But I have never been through what Mötley Crüe put me through.
Ginny: I really love Rudy. He is totally enamored of me. I mean, I've had men who've loved me before, but not for six months in a row.
Major Ashley-Pitt: In our experience, Americans are uncouth misfits who should be run out of their own barbaric country.
Matthew Quigley: Well, Lieutenant.
Major Ashley-Pitt: Major.
Matthew Quigley: Major. We already run the misfits outta our country. We sent 'em back to England.
Principal Jane Masterson: You can plunder my dungeon anytime.
Ned Gold: I'll bring my longbow.
G-Money: I had my jimmy waxed every day last week.
Red Webster: Don't ever marry an ugly woman. Just sucks the life right out of you.
Ernest Tucker: The funny thing about that little white speck on the top of chicken shit. That little white speck is chicken shit too.
Edward Rutledge: Mr. Adams is now calling our black slaves "Americans." Are they, now?
John Adams: Yes, they are. They're people, and they're here. If there's any other requirement, I've never heard of it.
Edward Rutledge: They are here, yes. But they are not people, sir, they are property.
Thomas Jefferson: No, sir, they are people who are being treated as property!
Ajax: I'll shove that bat up your ass and turn you into a popsicle.
Frank Pesce Jr.: I wanna do something I never did before.
Frank Pesce Sr.: Oh really, then why don't you go upstairs and clean your fucking room.