Det. Steve Crosetti: Either it's murder, or this library has a very strict overdue policy.
Sgt. Kay Howard: What is y'all's fascination with sperm?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: It's just a healthy curiosity. If it weren't for our daddy's sperm, wouldn't none of us be here.
Sgt. Kay Howard: Or your mama's eggs.
Det. John Munch: I don't like to form attachments with people. They either get suspended or throw china at you.
Det. Frank Pembleton: Do you think some people work harder to be stupider than others?
Det. Tim Bayliss: I'm going to go out on a limb and say yes.
Det. Frank Pembleton: Blind faith is the crutch of fools.
Lt. Al 'Gee' Giardello: Oh, I get it. You don't feel anything at all. You're the type of guy that two weeks from now, you'll be stopped at a traffic light and all this will hit you and when it hits, it'll hit hard. It'll hit you so hard that your heart will burst into a hundred pieces.
Det. Frank Pembleton: He who loses control, loses.
Sgt. Kay Howard: You're a man.
Det. Beau Felton: I'm your partner.
Sgt. Kay Howard: I'm a woman.
Det. Beau Felton: You're a cop.
Det. Stan Bolander: It's hard to meet single woman on this job. You meet plenty of widows, but the timing just don't seem right.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: Luther, Luther. Look both ways when you cross the street, my brother.
Luther Mahoney: You do the same.
Det. Tim Bayliss: So does the violence make them stupid or does the stupidity lead to violence?
Det. John Munch: Well, that's chicken and egg semantics. The important point is that we win some cases because our brains are repositories for intelligence and their brains are day-old banana pudding.
Lt. Al 'Gee' Giardello: When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in Baltimore, do as I tell you to.
Det. Stan Bolander: Have you been smoking the dope in the evidence room again?
Det. Frank Pembleton: You're not Catholic and you took communion?
Det. Tim Bayliss: Yeah, is that wrong?
Det. Frank Pembleton: If my God wins... You're screwed.
Det. John Munch: Life should come with a money back guarantee. If you're not satisfied, return unused portion for a full refund.
Det. Tim Bayliss: I can't stop seeing her face. Adena Watson's face in the rain. Wounds on her body. She was so tiny. I try not to care, but if I do that, if I actually stop caring, then I stop being who I am. No job's worth that.
Det. John Munch: The only thing I have in common with Judaism is we both don't like to work on Saturdays.
