The Simpsons (1989)

The Simpsons Christmas Special: Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire - S1-E1

Homer: [buying a chewtoy for Maggie.] It says it's for dogs, but she can't read.

The Simpsons Christmas Special: Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire - S1-E1

Marge: You will not be getting a tattoo for Christmas.
Homer: Yeah, if you want one you'll have to pay for it out of your own allowance.

Bart the General - S1-E5

Marge: Bart, you have to tell your teacher.
Homer: And violate the code of the schoolyard? I'd rather Bart died.

The_Iceman

Homer's Odyssey - S1-E3

Homer: Beer! Now there's a temporary solution!

Bart the Genius - S1-E2

Mrs. Krabappel: Now I don't want you to worry, class. These tests will have no effect on your grades. They merely determine your future social status and financial success. [She looks at Bart.] If any.

There's No Disgrace Like Home - S1-E4

Homer: Sometimes I think we're the worst family in town.
Marge: Well maybe we should move to a larger community.