Revealing mistake: When Rimmer wakes Lister up, as he stands up you can see he moves Lister's duvet with his shoulder, which he can't do, being a hologram. (00:15:20)
Revealing mistake: When the cat priest dies on the bed, watch him move his foot so Lister can sit on the edge. (00:26:40)
Answer: The cello is a large four-stringed instrument, which, when it is played, stands vertically on the floor between the player's legs (assuming they are seated). If it is to grow as large as the other instuments mentioned will, it would require a rather unseemly lack of femininity to be able to encompass it with the legs.
Rooster of Doom