The Penguin: Agh! Dead guys don't do that.
Dracula: Not dead... UN-dead.
The Penguin: I think I need to UN-wet my pants.
Dog: It just doesn't get any better than this!
Dog: Hi ho diggety!
Narrator: Sugar. Spice. And everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls. But Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction... Chemical X. Thus the Powerpuff Girls were born. Using their ultra-superpowers, Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime and the forces of evil.
Narrator: Mojo Jojo! Say it ain't so-so.
Mayor: No! I didn't take it! It was Ms. Bellum.
Narrator: There! It's time for you to make your speech.
Mayor: Okay... what speech?
Narrator: The speech you will make.
Mayor: Oh.
Narrator: No, not "oh!" You.
Mayor: Why?
Narrator: No, you.
Mayor: You?
Narrator: No, not me! You, the mayor.
Mayor: Me?
Narrator: Yes! That's what I said.
Mayor: Now, wait a minute. Who's "I"?
Narrator: I is you.
Mayor: Stop it.
Narrator: Gee, are you okay?
Mayor: I don't know any more.
Narrator: Oh, forget it.
Narrator: Just because you're a genius doesn't mean you're a smart guy.
Chocolate With Nuts / Mermaid Man And Barnacle Boy V - S3-E11
Spongebob: Quick, Patrick. If you could have anything right now, what would it be?
Patrick: Um...more time for thinking?
Dying For Pie / Imitation Krabs - S2-E6
Mr. Krabs: What's the most important rule here?
Spongebob: No free napkins?
Mr. Krabs: No, the other most important rule!
Spongebob: Only discuss the secret formula with Mr Krabs.
Mr. Krabs: As long as you do that, the formula is safe.
Squidward: I thought the most important rule was why do today what you can put off for tomorrow?
Mr. Krabs: But what's today, but yesterday's tomorrow?
Squidward: What?
Spongebob's Last Stand - S7-E22
Mr. Krabs: Alright, Plankton! It's Eugene Krabs, here, with, What's-His-Name! Now come on out!
Plankton: I can't.
Mr. Krabs: Come on outside, and take what's coming to you!
Plankton: I really can't come outside!
SpongeBob: Why not?
Plankton: Because I'm already out here, you bumbling bottom feeders! Open your eyes for crying out loud!
MuscleBob BuffPants / Squidward, the Unfriendly Ghost - S1-E11
Squidward: Spongebob, are you trying to drive me to the nut house?
Spongebob: No. Just into this hole.
Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy / Pickles - S1-E6
SpongeBob: Wow, Mermaidman and Barnacleboy.
Patrick: It's too bad they're old.
SpongeBob: What do you mean, Patrick? Old people are the greatest. They're full of wisdom and experience.
[Spongebob and Patrick have just been fried by Man-Ray.]
Patrick Star: What's that smell?
Spongebob Squarepants: That, Patrick, is the smell of defeat.
Patrick Star: Oh, good. I thought it was my skin.
Mr. Krabs: The health inspector is here! If he finds one health violation, he'll shut us down for good! We've got to do everything in our power to make sure he passes the Krusty Krab!
Spongebob Squarepants: But, Mr. Krabs, there's nothing to worry about. The Krusty Krab is the most perfect place in the universe.
Mr. Krabs: You really haven't got any brains at all, have you, son?
The Graveyard Shift / Krusty Love - S3-E13
Squidward: Years ago, at this very restaurant, the hatch-slinging slasher used to be a frycook, just like you. Only clumsier! And then, one night, when he was cutting the patties, it happened...
SpongeBob: He forgot the secret sauce?
Squidward: No.
SpongeBob: He didn't wash his hands?
Squidward: No!
SpongeBob: Irregular portions?
Squidward: NO! He cut off his own hand! By mistake!
SpongeBob: You mean like this?
[At every 'this', SpongeBob removes his arm and a new one grows back.]
SpongeBob: Or like this? Or this? Or this? But what about this? Or this? Or this? Or this?
Squidward: Except he wasn't a sponge!
SpongeBob: So?
Squidward: So it didn't grow back!
SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm every bit as good as Larry, and if I'm not, then may I be struck by...
[Rumble of thunder.]
SpongeBob SquarePants: ... A flying ice cream truck.
[A shadow forms over SpongeBob.]
SpongeBob SquarePants: And live!
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