Vice Principal Wolters: I care about these kids just as much as you do. And if I'm forced to choose between Mozart and reading and writing and long division, I choose long division.
Glenn Holland: Well, I guess you can cut the arts as much as you want, Gene. Sooner or later, these kids aren't going to have anything to read or write about.
Vice Principal Wolters: Corvair?
Mr. Glenn Holland: Yeah.
Vice Principal Wolters: I take it you didn't read Ralph Nader's book.
Mr. Glenn Holland: Well, unless Ralph is willing to buy me a new car, I'm going to have to stick with this one until the wheels fall off.
Vice Principal Wolters: Well, you might not have to wait that long. Heh, heh. Have a nice day.
Vice Principal Wolters: Have you been to any of the football games this season, Mr. Holland?
Glenn Holland: I can't say that I have, no.
Vice Principal Wolters: Well, Mrs. Jacobs and I feel that there's something missing.
Glenn Holland: Touchdowns.
Glenn Holland: I'm 60 years old, Gene. What are you going to do: write me a recommendation for the morgue?
Glenn Holland: It's almost funny. I got dragged into this gig kicking and screaming, and now it's the only thing I want to do.
Mr. Glenn Holland: Let me ask you a question. When you look in the mirror, what do you like best about yourself?
Gertrude Lang: My hair.
Mr. Glenn Holland: Why?
Gertrude Lang: Well, my father always says that it reminds him of the sunset.
Mr. Glenn Holland: Play the sunset. Close your eyes. One, two, three, four.
Glenn Holland: You work for 30 years because you think that what you do makes a difference, you think it matters to people, but then you wake up one morning and find out, well no, you've made a little error there, you're expendable. I should be laughing.
Mr. Glenn Holland: The day they cut the football budget in this state, that will be the end of Western Civilization as we know it.
Glenn Holland: Enough of us already think "time" is a magazine.
Glenn Holland: Play the sunset.
Glenn Holland: Well, congratulations, Gene. You've been looking for a way to get rid of me for 30 years, and they finally gave you an excuse.
Vice Principal Wolters: You know, I'm not as popular as you. I'm not anybody's favorite anything.
Glenn Holland: That's because you're the enemy, Gene. You just don't know it.
Glenn Holland: Which instrument do you think you'd like to play?
Louis Russ: Well, I was kinda thinkin' like... How about electric guitar?
Glenn Holland: Well, this is a marching band. The extension cord will kill us.
Irv: I'm not a god. That's just a rumor my mother started.
Claudia Draper: Now, you talk to me and pretend I'm sane, okay?
Aaron Levinsky: Okay.
Claudia Draper: And I'll do the same for you.
Richard Nelson: Thank you, gorgeous.
Marco Valentin: My name is Valentin.
Richard Nelson: I love that name.
Richard Nelson: Hi, I'm Nelson.
Richard Nelson: I wouldn't put a lot of faith on what the captain says. I'm an architect, and these boats weren't designed to float upside down.
The Player: We're more of the love, blood, and rhetoric school. Well, we can do you blood and love without the rhetoric, and we can do you blood and rhetoric without the love, and we can do you all three concurrent or consecutive. But we can't give you love and rhetoric without the blood. Blood is compulsory. They're all blood, you see.
Guildenstern: It's what people want, then?
The Player: It's what we do.
The Player: We can give you rapiers, rape, or both.
The Player: Are you familiar with this play?
Guildenstern: No.
The Player: A slaughterhouse! Eight corpses all totaled.
Guildenstern: Six!
The Player: Eight.
[Two actors act out being hanged, foreshadowing Rosencrantz and Guildenstern's demise.]
Guildenstern: What are they?
The Player: They're dead. (01:11:11)
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