Quotes from Kris Kristofferson movies and TV shows

Andy: You okay, Boss?
Mace Montana: Well, my chin's banged up pretty bad... I think my ribs are broke... an' it feels like I punctured a major organ, Andy... but I'm circus.

Karen: Why do you hunt them?
Whistler: I had a family once. A wife and two daughters. Then a drifter came calling one evening. A vampire. He toyed with them at first. Tried to make me decide which order they'd die in.

Whistler: Catch you fuckers at a bad time?

Whistler: Some of the legends are true though. Vampires are severely allergic to silver. Feed them garlic, and they go into anaphylactic shock. Then, of course, there's always sunlight, ultraviolet rays.
[Whistler turns on a weapon that produces ultraviolet light and points it at Blade's face.]
Whistler: I got this sucker running. You want to give it a try tonight?
[Blade takes the weapon from Whistler.]
Blade: It's still heavy.
Whistler: Well, you're so big.

Melissa: Well I think I've had just about enough of this, thank you very much. I'll think I'll take my things and GET OUT. If you'll pull over to the side, I'm sure I can hitch a ride very easily... Weren't you listening to me? I said I'm ready to get out.
Rubber Duck: You want out? We're being chased. You want out? Jump.
Melissa: You want to add the Mann Act to your collection?
Rubber Duck: Mann Act's for 18 year olds, not someone who's seen the better side of thirty.

Melissa: Why do they call you the Duck?
Rubber Duck: Because it rhymes with "luck." See, my daddy always told me to be just like a duck. Stay smooth on the surface and paddle like the devil underneath.

Sheriff Lyle Wallace aka Cottonmouth: You oughta be shot right where you're standing! So help me if I had a gun, I'd do it myself.
Rubber Duck: That badge would make it all right, wouldn't it?

Rubber Duck: How much is it, Lyle?
Sheriff Lyle Wallace aka Cottonmouth: Fifty. Each.
Bobby 'Love Machine' 'Pig Pen': You rob me, bastard.
Sheriff Lyle Wallace aka Cottonmouth: Sixty.
Rubber Duck: Hey, take it easy, this ain't an auction, man.

Rubber Duck: Piss on you, and piss on your law.

Sheriff Lyle Wallace aka Cottonmouth: I am the law. Don't you understand, I represent the law.
Rubber Duck: Well piss on ya, and piss on your law.

Orin Hanner Jr.: You want me to take him out?
Orin Hanner Sr.: You couldn't take out a cheeseburger from a drive-through window.

Orin Hanner Sr.: Doesn't this guy know the rules? I'm the rules.

Orin Hanner Sr.: You're violating my constitutional rights.
Jack Taggert: Mr. Hanner, I promise you, as sure as you stand here now, I'm gonna show you a new meaning to the word "violation."

Orin Hanner Sr.: So, I guess that makes killing you free.
Jack Taggert: Well, it would be free if you could.

Dr. Thomas Becker: You can't break something that's already broken.

Bill Smith: The first rule is: Never sleep with anyone who's crazier than you are. I don't know if you're crazier, but you're right up there on the top 10 of my weird list, lady.
Louise Baltimore: If you knew me better, I'd be number one.