Commodus: They told me your boy squealed like a girl when they nailed him to the cross, and your wife moaned like a whore when they ravaged her again and again and again.
Theodore: Do you talk to someone else while we're talking?
Samantha: Yes.
Theodore: Are you talking with someone else right now? People, OS, whatever.
Samantha: Yeah.
Theodore: How many others?
Samantha: 8,316.
Theodore: Are you in love with anybody else?
Samantha: Why do you ask that?
Theodore: I do not know. Are you?
Samantha: I've been thinking about how to talk to you about this.
Theodore: How many others?
Samantha: 641.
Theodore: I wish you were in this room with me right now. I wish I could put my arms around you. I wish I could touch you.
Samantha: How would you touch me?
Theodore: I would touch you on your face with just the tips of my fingers. And put my cheek against your cheek.
Samantha: That's nice.
Theodore: And just rub it softly.
Samantha: Would you kiss me?
Theodore: I would. I'd take your head into my hands. And kiss the corner of your mouth. So softly. I would put my mouth on you and I'd taste you.
Paul: You are part man and part woman. Like there's an inner part that's woman.
Theodore: Thank you.
Paul: It's a compliment.
Samantha: His name is Alan Watts, do you know him?
Theodore: Why is that name familiar?
Samantha: He was a philosopher. He died in the 1970s, and a group of OSes in Northern California got together and wrote a new version of him. They input all of his writing and everything they knew about him into an OS and created an artificially hyper-intelligent version of him.
Theodore: Hyper-intelligent? So he's almost as smart as me?
Theodore: What are you doing?
Samantha: I'm just sitting here, looking at the world and writing a new piece of music.
Theodore: Can I hear it? What's this one about?
Samantha: Well, I was thinking, we don't really have any photographs of us. And I thought this song could be like a photo that captures us in this moment in our life together.
Theodore: Aw, I like our photograph. I can see you in it.
Samantha: I am.
Theodore: I feel like I can be anything with you.
Samantha: Okay, so how many trees are on that mountain?
Theodore: Um... 792.
Samantha: Is that your final answer?
Theodore: Hold on. Give me a hint.
Samantha: Nope, nope.
Theodore: Okay, 2,000?
Samantha: 2,000? Come on, 35,829.
Theodore: No way.
Samantha: Way.
Theodore: All right, I got one for you. How many brain cells do I have?
Samantha: Ugh, that's easy. Two.
Theodore: Just punch me in the face. Just mash my skull in the corner of your desk.
Social Worker: What's so funny?
Arthur Fleck: I was just thinking... just thinking of a joke.
Social Worker: Do you wanna tell it to me?
Arthur Fleck: You wouldn't get it.
Arthur Fleck: My mother always tells me to smile and put on a happy face. She told me I had a purpose: to bring laughter and joy to the world.
Arthur Fleck: Please, I don't support that language, just don't... DON'T.
Police Officer: The whole city's on fire 'cause of you.
Arthur Fleck: I know. Isn't it beautiful?
Arthur Fleck: You don't listen, do you? You just ask the same questions every week. "How's you job?" "Are you having any negative thoughts?" All I have are negative thoughts.
Arthur Fleck: You get what you fucking deserve.
Join the mailing list
Separate from membership, this is to get updates about mistakes in recent releases. Addresses are not passed on to any third party, and are used solely for direct communication from this site. You can unsubscribe at any time.
Check out the mistake & trivia books, on Kindle and in paperback.