Quotes from Jason Lee movies and TV shows - page 2 of 3

Syndrome: See, now you respect me, because I'm a threat. That's the way it works. There are cities, whole countries who want respect, and they will pay through the nose to get it. How do you think I got rich? I've created weapons, and now I have a weapon only I can defeat, and when I unleash into the...you sly dog! You got me monologuing!

Syndrome: You sir truly are Mr. Incredible. I mean, I was right to idolize you. I knew you were tough, but tricking the probe by hiding under the bones of another super? Oh man, I'm still geeking out about it!

Mr. Incredible: Call off the missiles! I'll do anything!
Syndrome: Too late. Fifteen years too late.

Syndrome: You took away my future, I'm simply returning the favor. Oh, don't worry, I'll be a good mentor. Supporting, encouraging, everything you weren't. And in time, who knows? He might make a good sidekick.

Syndrome: And when everyone's super, no one will be.

Syndrome: I'll be a better hero than you ever were!
Mr. Incredible: You mean you killed off real heroes so that you can pretend to be one?
Syndrome: Oh I'm real, real enough to defeat you, and I did it without your precious gifts, your oh-so-special powers.

Jay Murphy: It's hard to tell how many emotions were real and how many were manufactured just to get the other person to bring over more pot.

Samantha Andrews: How do you feel?
Jay Murphy: Like ten bucks.

Max Abbitt: I thought we agreed not to set each other up anymore.
Jay Murphy: No, I agreed not to let you set me up anymore after that girl who you said was perfect for me tied me up and came out with that hood and cane and offered to beat the shit out of me.

Jay Murphy: Why would I set you up with some girl that I banged?
Max Abbitt: Share the wealth, brother.

T.S. Quint: Why do palm reading topless?
Brodie: It makes the news easier to take. She could tell me I was going to die in ten minutes, just as long as she told me topless.
T.S. Quint: Your maleness amazes me sometimes.

Brodie: You used to like tits too.
T.S. Quint: Hey, I love tits as much as the next guy, but why should I pay some old hag good money for some supernatural chicanery coupled with a pair of sagging wrinkled weathered boobs?

Brodie: That kid is back... on the escalator again.

Stan Lee: They look happy, don't they?
Brodie: What, the bras?

T.S. Quint: Maybe he's calmed down, we'll talk about it reasonably.
Brodie: Reasonably shmeasonably, you should go over there and give him shit.

Brodie: I call you all time.
Rene: "Rene, my mom's asleep. Come over." You call that romantic? When was the last time you pulled out my chair, or told me I was beautiful?
Brodie: And this guy does all this in a day?
Rene: This guy already introduced me to his mother.
Brodie: Really?

Brandi: Suitor #2.
Gil Hicks: Hey, what about me?
Brodie: Aw Gil, just shut the fuck up.

T.S. Quint: How easily do you quit? Say you wind up with one of us?
Brodie: Hopefully not Rush Limbaugh over here.
Gil Hicks: Well, now, I'm not like Rush Limbaugh.
Brodie: Well, why not? Because he's fat? Now you have something against fat people, too?

Brodie: You're going to listen to me? To something that I said? Hell, most of the time I'm just talking out of my ass... or sticking my hand in it.

Jared Svenning: Once I realised the both of you were in the mall together, I decided to set up this little ambush to remove you and your sidekick here from the premises, permanently.
Brodie: Hey, why am I his side-kick? How do you know he's not my side-kick?