Michelle: Okay, I'm a hot girl. Now what do you want to do?
Jim: I want to feel your boobs.
Michelle: No, you dingbat. You don't just go groping away. You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.
Michelle: Get off my husband you little piece of shit!
Michelle: Wow, Steve Stifler just gave a rose to a girl and meant it. It's like monkeys learning to use tools for the first time.
Willow: That's me as a vampire? I'm so evil and...skanky. And I think I'm kind of gay.
Xander: What's with the hand wave? You see that? Does that, like, mean something?
Willow: It's code. I think it breaks down to 'choo-choo!'
Anya: It probably means to follow him. That, or wait here for him.
Willow: [whispering.] Ask him.
Xander: [yelling.] Hey, Riley? What's the [hand gesture.] all about?
Riley: It means yell real loud so the vampires who don't know we're coming will have a sporting chance.
Xander: See, now he's all mad and sarcastic.
Willow: It's because you were doing all that yelling, Mr. Stealthy-pants.
Band Candy - S3-E6
Willow: Kiss rocks? Why would anyone want to kiss...oh, wait. I get it.
Frank Jones: When I first got married to your mother, we barely knew each other. Could barely even speak the English language.
Julia Jones: But you're from Jersey.
Frank Jones: I'm trying to make a point here.
Julia Jones: You had me at hello.
Grant Funkyerdoder: I'm just a girl. Standing in front of a boy. Asking him to love her.
Frank Jones: I was wrong about Grant. He's really a nice guy. He even liked you when you were butt-ugly.
Julia Jones: How do you...?
Frank Jones: I saw it in your flashback.
Lily: You son of a bitch!
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