Transformers (2007)

Sam Witwicky: Fifty years from now, when you're looking back at your life, don't you want to be able to say you had the guts to get in the car?

Sam Witwicky: Miles? Miles, listen to me. Listen. My car, it stole itself, okay?
Miles: What are you talking about, man?
Sam Witwicky: Satan's Camaro. In my yard! It's stalking me!

Optimus Prime: With the All Spark gone, we cannot return life to our planet. And fate has yielded its reward: a new world to call home. We live among its people now, hiding in plain sight, but watching over them in secret, waiting, protecting. I have witnessed their capacity for courage, and though we are worlds apart, like us, there's more to them than meets the eye. I am Optimus Prime, and I send this message to any surviving Autobots taking refuge among the stars. We are here. We are waiting.

Trent: Didn't you try out for the football team last year?
Sam Witwicky: No, that wasn't like a real tryout. I was researching a book I was writing.
Trent: What's it about? Sucking in sports?
Sam Witwicky: No, it's about the link between brain damage and football. It's a good book. Your friends would love it. It's got mazes in it, coloring areas, pop-up pictures. It's a lot of fun.

Sam Witwicky: So, listen. I was wondering if I could ride you home. I mean, uh... Give you a ride home.

Sam Witwicky: I bought a car, and it turned out to be an alien robot. Who knew?

Judy Witwicky: [To Sam.] Oh, for Pete's sake! You are so defensive! Were you masturbating?
Sam Witwicky: No!
Judy Witwicky: Well, we don't have to call it that word, if it makes you uncomfortable. We could call it.Sam's Happy Time.

Maggie: What's going on?
Defense Secretary Keller: You're coming with me. You're going to be my advisor.
Glen: Me too?
Defense Secretary Keller: Who's this?
Maggie: He's my advisor.
Defense Secretary Keller: He comes too.

Ron Witwicky: I got a little surprise for you son.
[Drives by a Porsche dealership.]
Sam Witwicky: No, no no, no no! You got to be kidding me!
Ron Witwicky: Yeah, I am. You're not getting a Porsche.

Starscream: I live to serve you, Lord Megatron.
Megatron: Where is the cube?
Starscream: The humans have taken it.
Megatron: You've failed me yet again, Starscream.

Sam Witwicky: It's a robot. But, like a different...you know, like a super advanced robot. It's probably Japanese. Yeah, it's definitely Japanese.

Mikaela Banes: This car's a pretty good driver.
Sam Witwicky: Why don't you sit in that seat?
Mikaela Banes: I'm not gonna sit in that seat, he's driving!
Sam Witwicky: Maybe you should sit in my lap.
Mikaela Banes: Why?
Sam Witwicky: Uh...I have the only seatbelt. Safety first.

Sam Witwicky: This... I can't do it anymore.
Judy Witwicky: What?
Sam Witwicky: You're putting girl jewelry on a boy dog. He's got enough self-esteem issues as a Chihuahua, Mom.
Judy Witwicky: That's his bling.

Jazz: What's crackin' little bitches? This looks like a cool place to kick it!
Sam Witwicky: How did he learn to talk like that?
Optimus Prime: We've learned Earth's languages through the world-wide web.