Barbie: [in tears] I'm not pretty anymore.
Narrator: Note to filmmakers - Margot Robbie is not the actress to get this point across.
Gloria: It is literally impossible to be a woman. You are so beautiful and so smart, and it kills me that you don't think you're good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow we're always doing it wrong. You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can't ask for money because that's crass. You have to be a boss, but you can't be mean. You have to lead, but you can't squash other people's ideas. You're supposed to love being a mother but don't talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman, but also always be looking out for other people. You have to answer for men's bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you're accused of complaining. You're supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you're supposed to be a part of the sisterhood. But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful. You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It's too hard! It's too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault. I'm just so tired of watching myself and every single other woman tie herself into knots so that people will like us. And if all of that is also true for a doll just representing women, then I don't even know.
Sasha: Men hate women and women hate women. It's the one thing we can all agree on.
Ken: To be honest, when I found out the patriarchy wasn't just about horses, I lost interest.
Barbie: I'd love to see what kind of nude blob he's packing under those jeans.
Gloria: You don't have your license.
Sasha: This car has no engine.
Sasha: Hell yeah, White Saviour Barbie.
Ken: You guys aren't doing patriarchy very well.
Corporate Man: We're actually doing patriarchy very well... we're just better at hiding it.
Barbie: It's like I've been in a dream where I was really invested in the Zack Snyder cut of 'Justice League'.
Aaron Dinkins: I'm a man with no power, does that make me a woman?
Doctor: No, I won't let you do just one appendectomy.
Ken: But I'm a man.
Doctor: But not a doctor.
Ken: Can I talk to a doctor?
Doctor: You are talking to a doctor.
Ken: I need a clicky pen.
Doctor: No.
Ken: A sharpy thing?
Doctor: No.
Ken: [as he walks toward a male doctor] There he is.
Doctor: Somebody get security.
Ruth: We mothers stand still so our daughters can look back and see how far they've come.
