Michael Scott: This is an environment of welcoming, and you should just get the hell outta here.
Barney: Suit up!
Francine: The point is, there was a time when you two weren't always fighting.
Hayley: That was before I knew dad was a gun toting maniac.
Stan: Beatnik.
Hayley: Warmonger.
Stan: Chupacabra.
Hayley: I'm the mexican Bigfoot?
Stan: You heard her. She admitted it.
Dr. Meredith Grey: At some point, you have to make a decision. Boundaries don't keep other people out. They fence you in. Life is messy. That's how we're made. So, you can waste your lives drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them. But there are some lines that are way too dangerous to cross.
Rochelle Rock: I'm gonna slap the black off you.
Mac: Jesus Christ, Frank. Are you cutting your toenails with a steak knife?
Charlie Kelly: I suppose you have a problem with that, too?
Frank Reynolds: Ah! Oh! Oh! Botched toe! I botched that one. Oh, that's a botch job. That's bleeding. I need some trash to plug up the cut.
Police officer: It's police policy not to waste resources looking for a missing person in the first 24 hours because they usually show up on their own, and after 24 hours, if they're still missing, it usually means they're dead and we don't look for them that hard then either.
Marni Fliss: If you have baggage, I want to know about it.
Nate Solomon: If? Have you MET me?
Nancy Botwin: Obviously menopause has effected your sense of smell.
Lupita: I don't smell with my coochie.
Dave: What happened to our stash?
Vicky: Our stash? Since when do we have a stash?
Dave: You know.
Vicky: No. I thought we decided to be more responsible, and you were gonna get rid of the pot.
Dave: I am getting rid of it. Little by little.
Valerie Cherish: Note to self: After a long day at work, I don't want to see that.
Orel: Boy Doughy, Reverend Putty's sermon today sure made me think.
Doughy: Orel! You know you're not supposed to think when it comes to god and faith.
Danny: But I thought you had to pee.
Anne Sorelli: My anger absorbed it. Outside, now.
Mr. Blick: The Kraken ate my tail.
Huey Freeman: Vision? What do you know about my vision? My vision would turn your world upside down, tear asunder your illusions, and send the sanctuary of your own ignorance crashing down around you. Now ask yourself, Are you ready to see that vision?